In the course of reading the book Leading Out Loud by Terry Pearce, the author asks three questions which I think are worth giving some thought to:
1) What single value is so important that you would (will) teach it to your children as the most important foundation of a happy life?
2) What condition in chosen industry would you change and how?
3) What is the most important social issue that we have deal with as a community? Ho would you correct it?
These are questions - at least 1 and 3 are - worthy of thought by anyone. Question 2 I will leave for anyone that is employed to ponder.
What single value is so important that you would (will) teach it to your children as the most important foundation of a happy life?
That was an easy answer for me.
Kindness.
Kindness, in my humble opinion, is one of the virtues that has almost been completely erased from our cultural, national, and international consciousness. We are called to action, to accusation, to confrontation, to independent "thought" - but in all of this, kindness is never mentioned.
Kindness is the salve that makes the necessary palatable, that makes the required seem somewhat less painful, that corrects without shame, that comes out of the blue to bring a touch of joy into a day of bleakness.
Kindness takes effort, true. It means thinking before speaking, pondering before acting, and sometimes being willing to delay gratification or even success to ensure that the individuals involved are successful as well. Kindness can be as quick as a coffee paid for by someone else or as extensive as a review which should have sounded harsh sounding constructive instead.
If you have been on the receiving end of an unkind person, you know the shame, the anger, the hurt that an unkind person spreads. And yes, if you read between the lines, I have had all of things in my past.
My mother was and is unfailingly kind and hopefully, any kindness I have is a reflection of her much more evident kindness.
What do you think the single most important value is and why?
I love your answer. Kindness is something that usually has to be taught; it doesn't seem come naturally for many people.
ReplyDeleteWhat came to mind for me when I read your question was self-discipline. That, or self-control, though I think self-control must be learned first because it's the foundation of self-discipline. Without self-discipline there is no patience and no ability to sustain oneself through difficult tasks or circumstances. Self-discipline must apply to emotions, words, and actions. Having the strength to control emotional reactions would save many later regrets. Having the self-discipline to not give up would help us accomplish much. I think everyone seeks a sense of purpose, but without self-discipline I wonder how many find it.
I think it’s an improper question, TB.
ReplyDeleteThere are several virtues that are actively suppressed in our society today, and different situations will require different virtues to deal with the. They are all important and the problems start when we use one virtue to trump another. If I had answer that I might say wisdom is more important. At this point, that is a trait I wish I could acquire most... but that’s just me.
I think I would maybe have to say Respect. For everyone and everything. I think if you respect people and things, kindness would follow.
ReplyDeleteBut perhaps respect would follow kindness...
Leigh, those are great ones as well - and actually something I have recognized as needing improvements in my own life. The ability to not respond emotionally I think I have learned the hard way over the years. My ability to control some of my impulses, not so much.
ReplyDeleteGlen - agreed that we are lacking in many virtues, some of which are being actively put away. And also agree that they have different application. That said, wisdom is a very good one, although for me I only seem to get wise in the proportion I have made mistakes...
ReplyDeleteLinda, respect is a good one as well - and almost totally absent from our society (I wonder if that is because respect means you have to acknowledge someone as more important than yourself).
ReplyDelete