I finally, effectively, cut the knot on social media this week.
I have not gone so far as to delete accounts, as (truly) the Book of Face account is kept primarily at this point for updates and interactions about my family and the simple fact that (sticking with my rule of not drawing attention to one's self) sudden cutoffs draw attention. But all platforms are off of anything I easily get to them on. If I want to log in, I have to go through the laborious process of logging in.
More to the point - along with my other tracking sheets for 2021 - I have added a new spreadsheet, and will start adding on days that I am off of it the way I track my aerobic miles, my dairy making, and any other activity that I was going to make progress on this year. It has now become a trackable goal.
Today is Day One.
This will cost me, certainly. Any organization I am a part of that is based on Social Media will now become effectively dead to me (which, with exception of Iaijutsu, is all of them). Any conversation outside of a very narrow band of people that I interact with in person or on text will vanish (to be fair, most of those are long range and irregular at best anyway). I will be woefully uninformed about the goings on in any number of ways.
What am I buying?
My sanity, for one. My privacy, for another. Perhaps most importantly, the first real step in working to extricate myself from a system that needs to know all about you and sacrifices the privacy of the individual to do it.
I feel, strangely enough, a bit forlorn in doing this. Not that it has been a large part of my life over the last few years, but it has put me in contact with a great many people, some of whom I have greatly enjoyed.
But my life now trends in a different direction. Time to simply move on.
I saw where those mainstream platforms were headed the day they came out. I know nothing about them. I’ve heard that they are designed from the ground up to be addictive.
ReplyDeleteI mean no offense, TB... but are you addicted? Maybe just a little?
Glen, I think back in the post where I discussed the Social Internet and the podcast that I drew the term from, the neurology behind social media was discussed a bit - and yes, you are precisely right, The Book of Face and its compatriots are designed in such a way to be mentally addictive. So it is a fair statement to say yes, I am at least somewhat addicted (no offense implied).
DeleteThat said, and given the construct of how we communicate now, in a real sense it is also very much effectively giving up a great deal of social interaction. That is the part I am perhaps finding hard - but is that not also just an appeal to my vanity, that somehow I will be missed? I very much perhaps doubt it for 80% of the folks I am "connected" with - in fact, they may not know I am missing at all.
Yeah - I meant no offense either! And I know how hard it is to break ties with people - if that is indeed what you'd be doing...
DeleteGlen, I do not know that I am consciously or intentionally breaking ties with people. However, so many people communicated via social media that I think, by default, this is the fact of what will happen.
DeleteI had a myspace account when I was a youth pastor, to keep up to date with the kids I was watching over.
ReplyDeleteThat morphed into a FB account when that got hot. I quit looking or even logging in maybe 10 years ago. I saw how consumed my wife was, and I shy away from things that attempt to take over my time.
Well done. It may be tough at first to peel away from the plastic society, but it's worth it. It's fun to talk to people and not have a phone interrupt you.
I admire your organizational skills. I long to do that...
Courage and Faith brother.
It is a funny thing STxAR: now all the "youngsters" do not use The Book of Face, mostly because their parents are on it and they do not want them seeing what they are doing it.
DeleteI do not know that I have ever been consumed by it, but I have certainly probably paid more attention than I should over the years (and arguably, I have reduced my time in general over the last few years).
It is funny how much of this has become instinctual and a habit. Having deleted the link from my phone, I am surprised by the amount of time I keep "reaching" to see what the update it. Tells me something, I think.
I do not know how organized I may be - but my mind works well with spreadsheets, for whatever reason. Makes it easy to organize when I think of it like that.
Thanks for the thoughts. We will get through this.
When FB was a hot, new thing, my brother said that he'd heard that it was a good way to find old classmates. I loved his answer when I asked how that went: "Oh there were lots of old classmates there.....none of the cool kids though."
ReplyDeleteI once got an "invitation" email to join it from a SIL of mine. There was an "opt out" button at the bottom of the email. I clicked it and have not been bothered since. I did tell my granddaughter that I realized I was missing a lot of her family interaction, but that I had an email address, a snailmail address, and a phone number. If she really wanted to talk to me, it's not hard.
I have started a half dozen blog comments today, and erased them all before posting. I'm finding that my interests and interactions on the internet are narrowing rapidly. For our mental health, my wife and I are detaching from much of the media and looking at life around us in the here and now. There are some we'll keep up with, such as our gracious host here, Glen F. and Phil, etc. and we enjoy those comment threads not overly infected with spam, trolls, and flame wars.
Greg, my experience was similar: originally I found a lot of my classmates, and then realized that for many of them, there was a reason we were not "connected" in school and no reason to be after that.
DeleteIf I keep it for a reason, it is really for my parents at this point - and The Ravishing Mrs. TB probably posts enough pictures for the both of us, so I think we are covered there. I will say that I think the era of the phone as a contact tool is largely over - I can count on the fingers of one hand the people that will call or even text me on my phone outside of my immediate family. It still is important for my parents generation, but not for mine it seems.
I have been policing the extent of my InterWeb presence as well, or at least being more thoughtful about what and where I post. It is a mental health issue, and at least for me a stress issue as well. There is simply a lot of anger and even - dare I say it - hate right now. I just do not need that in my life. But for sure, it narrows the interests on the InterWeb greatly.
Thanks for your continued trust and interest. We will work to justify it.
I have never been on any of the social media groups. I am not a "joiner" to start with, rather a cantankerous, ornery old curmudgeon who is often called "antisocial" by my wife. I prefer to think of it as being selective, and more interested in meaningful social interaction than fluff. I do occasionally comment on a few interesting blogs, but not even a whole lot of that.
ReplyDeleteThink of it this way, TB. In the old days, it was a marker of importance that a man was NOT at everyone's immediate beck and call. A man of importance was one that you had to make some effort to make contact with.
NM, that is a great point - and frankly, one that remains true in the highest level of our society.
DeleteToday was Day 3. The instinctual trying to click over to social media is still strong. Apparently I have a ways to go.
write letters. send emails. Use a telephone.
ReplyDeletePutting your life on facebook is the action of a prepubescent female.
Collectively, it helped kill America
Anonymous, it is odd - I literally cannot remember the last time I received a letter. It has been that long.
DeleteIt is funny - using your phraseology would be offensive to many, many users of social media. The fact that it may very well be true is all the more darkly humorous.
I do not know to what extent it helped kill anything, but it certainly added zero to people's ability to think and communicate.
Good for you! You think you will miss it but after a while you will wonder why you ever cared at all. Deleted mine in 2013. I use Reddit but Reddit is a goldmine of info so I don't consider it social media as such. I hope my comments do not read as preachy..just trying to support the causes!
ReplyDeleteNot preachy at all EGB! The "missing" has become more of a realization of "Wow, that was quite a habit".
DeleteYoutube would be another example of a not quite a social media site which could become a dangerous habit but is indeed full of information as well.