"People don't walk into the top spot. They're driven." - Eugene O'Kelly, Chasing Daylight
Why are some people driven and others are not?
I ask this question as someone who (so far as I can tell) is not particularly driven. Certainly I am able to dedicate periods of time and concentration to a task or tasks, but that inevitably fades away and I seem to come back to my normal workaday and life pace.
I write because it seems to me that so much of life runs to the driven (and therefore, many of the rewards) that have to ask the question "Could I be driven?" More importantly, "Should I be?"
Or is being driven something which we all possess but only in the context of something in which we are interested? Does "Driven" equate to "Enthusiasm"?
It occurs to me no. Enthusiasm can be about one or many things; driven is a way of life.
Could I become driven? Could I perform at the uber-high level of performance consistently? I honestly don't know. The driven have a vision, a goal, that they constantly keep in front of them to keep them going. They also seem to naturally be able to maintain these high levels of focus.
That's certainly not me. I have no overwhelming vision to keep me going - in fact, just keeping myself in the game from day to day is something of an accomplishment. I am also not a person who can really maintain a high level of focus on one thing - after all, there are plenty of others things that also need to happen along with that one thing (sometimes driven people don't remember this).
Perhaps too, that thing I want is more nebulous than a specific thing or a specific accomplishment. How do you become driven to a lifestyle and pace of life that is almost the antithesis of driven?
The times that I have tried to drive myself - to become focused, energetic, active - have generally been periods that I can only maintain for a short period of time. At some point the energy fades, the focus dissipates, and I'm again trapped with the meaninglessness of most of what I have focusing on. In fact, I often feel less engaged than when I started.
There's an exception, of course: when it is something that I am interested in. Then my interest does not die and the energy does not fade; in fact, the flame is only fanned. But this often seems to fade as well - in this case not so much from a lack of ability to maintain as a lack of a place for that interest to take me.
If focus can mean succeeding (in the larges sense of the word), driven can lead to focus. But enthusiasm can lead to focus as well - let's be honest, you can't focus long term on anything that you're not at some level engaged in.
So maybe I'm asking the wrong question yet again. It shouldn't be "Can I become driven?" but "What am I enthusiastic about? What do I love to do?" Either way, that will give me the thing to focus on - and the energy to do it.
Friday, July 13, 2012
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Stuck
How does one make a change to one's life when one has no idea what that change should be?
This is sense I have of things right now, as I sit and read God's word, meditate, pray, read and ponder.
I feel stuck - not trapped necessarily, just stuck, as if I were in a mud pit that I have little or no chance of pulling myself out of yet do not seem to be sinking further.
We've agreed, I think, that hope is not alone sufficient to get me out of this. It takes achievement, of course - but achievement without direction is no more productive that hitting nails into a board on the ground: without knowing what the board is meant to do and where the nails are meant to go, it's activity that accomplishes nothing.
There are ways in which I feel straitjacketed by choices, without a sense that I can make a choice that will significantly improve my situation. It's having no really good choices even as the choices you have made are not really contributing.
I keep thinking that I need some kind of epiphany, some kind of break-out thought that will give me this direction and the change I need. But nothing seems to come through: a sort of blank, empty canvas continues to roll before eyes with nothing on it.
How does one break out of one's mindset and seeing to the perception and hope (there, I've said it) that one needs to inform the achievement one needs to make to alter one's life?
This is sense I have of things right now, as I sit and read God's word, meditate, pray, read and ponder.
I feel stuck - not trapped necessarily, just stuck, as if I were in a mud pit that I have little or no chance of pulling myself out of yet do not seem to be sinking further.
We've agreed, I think, that hope is not alone sufficient to get me out of this. It takes achievement, of course - but achievement without direction is no more productive that hitting nails into a board on the ground: without knowing what the board is meant to do and where the nails are meant to go, it's activity that accomplishes nothing.
There are ways in which I feel straitjacketed by choices, without a sense that I can make a choice that will significantly improve my situation. It's having no really good choices even as the choices you have made are not really contributing.
I keep thinking that I need some kind of epiphany, some kind of break-out thought that will give me this direction and the change I need. But nothing seems to come through: a sort of blank, empty canvas continues to roll before eyes with nothing on it.
How does one break out of one's mindset and seeing to the perception and hope (there, I've said it) that one needs to inform the achievement one needs to make to alter one's life?
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Hope and Achievement
What then do I do with temporal hope?
If hope is a desire or cherished dream, something we anticipate or expect to happen, how do I make hope something more than just a wispy thing that I cling to when I feel bad about my situation or my life? How, like the alchemists of old, do I transmute that hope into something of actual value?
I face and address the reality that hope without action is simply nothing more than a dream.
Hope can be a grand thing. It can be the initiator of any number of great actions. It can drive us to greater efforts than we thought were possible. Hope keeps us up late at night or early in the morning when we would rather be sleeping; it drives us to try on more time to make that contact or initiate that conversation or simply send that resume. Hope helps us to see the great things that can be possible in our lives.
But hope is not the same as achievement.
Achievement is that less glamorous word, the word that reeks of hard labor and sweat and disappointment and being thrown back time and time again. It is the thing that makes all other things possible - without achievement, there is nothing else. It's the word that expresses the concept of Henry Ford: "Opportunity is missed by most people because it's dressed in overalls and looks like work".
Hope drives achievement as fuel drives an engine. I work to achieve many things; without the hope that there is some greater purpose or desire being gained, my achievement merely becomes a dull grind of things I have to do.
Can achievement bring the certainty that hope implies? It depends on what you mean by certainty. Certainly there is always an element of chance, of things not working out. But in reality, if work and achievement don't make hope more certain, they certainly increase the chances the chances that one's hopes will become achieved - as Samuel Goldwyn said, "The harder I work, the luckier I get."
So let us have hope and let us use hope, by all means. But let us not make the mistake that hope alone will change our lives. That expectation of hope can come, but only when it is undergirded by labor of achievement towards that hope.
If hope is a desire or cherished dream, something we anticipate or expect to happen, how do I make hope something more than just a wispy thing that I cling to when I feel bad about my situation or my life? How, like the alchemists of old, do I transmute that hope into something of actual value?
I face and address the reality that hope without action is simply nothing more than a dream.
Hope can be a grand thing. It can be the initiator of any number of great actions. It can drive us to greater efforts than we thought were possible. Hope keeps us up late at night or early in the morning when we would rather be sleeping; it drives us to try on more time to make that contact or initiate that conversation or simply send that resume. Hope helps us to see the great things that can be possible in our lives.
But hope is not the same as achievement.
Achievement is that less glamorous word, the word that reeks of hard labor and sweat and disappointment and being thrown back time and time again. It is the thing that makes all other things possible - without achievement, there is nothing else. It's the word that expresses the concept of Henry Ford: "Opportunity is missed by most people because it's dressed in overalls and looks like work".
Hope drives achievement as fuel drives an engine. I work to achieve many things; without the hope that there is some greater purpose or desire being gained, my achievement merely becomes a dull grind of things I have to do.
Can achievement bring the certainty that hope implies? It depends on what you mean by certainty. Certainly there is always an element of chance, of things not working out. But in reality, if work and achievement don't make hope more certain, they certainly increase the chances the chances that one's hopes will become achieved - as Samuel Goldwyn said, "The harder I work, the luckier I get."
So let us have hope and let us use hope, by all means. But let us not make the mistake that hope alone will change our lives. That expectation of hope can come, but only when it is undergirded by labor of achievement towards that hope.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Hope: Definition
If I say I am lacking in hope, what does that really mean? What is hope anyway?
Let's take a short ride on the Bus of Knowledge:
Hope: From the Old English hopian, akin to Middle High German hoffen (to hope)
(Well, that's not very exciting - other than an interesting footnote that hope in the English language is not descended from Latin, French, or Greek).
How about a definition?
1) Verbal: to cherish a desire with anticipation; to desire with expectation of obtainment; to expect with confidence
2) Noun: a desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment; expectation of fulfillment or success.
Okay, now we're getting somewhere.
Look at the words that repeat themselves above: desire, expect/expectation; obtainment (fulfillment's the same thing). Simply put, hope is something that we desire, cherish, or expect to be fulfilled, obtained or successful.
Those are pretty high expectations for a four letter word. Cherish? Desire? These are highly personal words, words that speak of something springing deeply within us. To disappoint something deeply personal is to be in a great deal of pain.
Suddenly I understand why the loss of hope is so devastating. If I have no anticipation that something I cherish or desire (or even that prosaic word, expect) has any chance of being obtained or successful, what do I have to look forward to? More of the same - or even a downward trend?
Again, let's be clear that the definition listed above is not simply enough to be accomplished. Just because I cherish or desire something does not mean it will magically come to pass without effort. Many people fall down at this point, believing that hope alone is sufficient to accomplish things.
What is it that we desire? What is it that we cherish? What is it that we hope for?
Let's take a short ride on the Bus of Knowledge:
Hope: From the Old English hopian, akin to Middle High German hoffen (to hope)
(Well, that's not very exciting - other than an interesting footnote that hope in the English language is not descended from Latin, French, or Greek).
How about a definition?
1) Verbal: to cherish a desire with anticipation; to desire with expectation of obtainment; to expect with confidence
2) Noun: a desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment; expectation of fulfillment or success.
Okay, now we're getting somewhere.
Look at the words that repeat themselves above: desire, expect/expectation; obtainment (fulfillment's the same thing). Simply put, hope is something that we desire, cherish, or expect to be fulfilled, obtained or successful.
Those are pretty high expectations for a four letter word. Cherish? Desire? These are highly personal words, words that speak of something springing deeply within us. To disappoint something deeply personal is to be in a great deal of pain.
Suddenly I understand why the loss of hope is so devastating. If I have no anticipation that something I cherish or desire (or even that prosaic word, expect) has any chance of being obtained or successful, what do I have to look forward to? More of the same - or even a downward trend?
Again, let's be clear that the definition listed above is not simply enough to be accomplished. Just because I cherish or desire something does not mean it will magically come to pass without effort. Many people fall down at this point, believing that hope alone is sufficient to accomplish things.
What is it that we desire? What is it that we cherish? What is it that we hope for?
Monday, July 09, 2012
Hope: Situational
Bogha Frois and I had another one of the liberating conversations last weekend that (inevitably) seems to result in additional deep thought.
We were discussing the thoughts expressed last week here about trying to be something that you're not, and the inevitable conflict this seems to create within yourself. Add to it one or more bad relationships in the workplace, and you've got all the makings of a personal moment of decision.
"It's hope" she said.
"Hope?"
"Hope" she said again. "Or the lack thereof. There's no sense that anything is going to get better, that there is no timeline I can put on the situation to say 'After this date, I'm moving on to something better'. Just the general sense that this is as good as things are going to get and it only gets less good from here."
As we walked through the ramifications of hope - what it may or may not be, what it would like like in each of our situations - I realized what a vital element it is and how, much like her, it was missing in great dollops from my own life as well.
Hope is the great element that we all need - in some fashion - in our life. Hope gives us the sense that this is not all that there is, that there is something better. But at the same time we must be careful. Hope is not a substitution for hard work and effort. Hope is a feeling, an emotion, a dream - and these three things in and of themselves will not change anything.
Remove hope from a person - any sense that things will improve, that there is a better something out there - and what is left is a dull drone-like existence of living from day to day. Nothing will remove the zest from daily living more than a lack of hope.
Which of course raises the question: How do you get and maintain hope?
Of course I wish I had better answers than I always do. Ironically, for the Christian eternal hope is always the easier of the two to point towards: hope in Christ, hope in His saving grace and His promises, the hope of eternal life. Temporally for the Christian - at least, temporally for me - somewhat harder to find. I am subject to the same stresses and strains as all others; I am subject to situations that seem not to change and people that seem impervious to reason and days of the long black tunnel of existence. I can literally go weeks without any wisp of hope clouding the iron-gray sky of daily life.
But we - I - need to figure this out. Life without hope becomes not life at all but existence. And at only existence, we can scarcely seek to achieve the excellence that we are created to do.
We were discussing the thoughts expressed last week here about trying to be something that you're not, and the inevitable conflict this seems to create within yourself. Add to it one or more bad relationships in the workplace, and you've got all the makings of a personal moment of decision.
"It's hope" she said.
"Hope?"
"Hope" she said again. "Or the lack thereof. There's no sense that anything is going to get better, that there is no timeline I can put on the situation to say 'After this date, I'm moving on to something better'. Just the general sense that this is as good as things are going to get and it only gets less good from here."
As we walked through the ramifications of hope - what it may or may not be, what it would like like in each of our situations - I realized what a vital element it is and how, much like her, it was missing in great dollops from my own life as well.
Hope is the great element that we all need - in some fashion - in our life. Hope gives us the sense that this is not all that there is, that there is something better. But at the same time we must be careful. Hope is not a substitution for hard work and effort. Hope is a feeling, an emotion, a dream - and these three things in and of themselves will not change anything.
Remove hope from a person - any sense that things will improve, that there is a better something out there - and what is left is a dull drone-like existence of living from day to day. Nothing will remove the zest from daily living more than a lack of hope.
Which of course raises the question: How do you get and maintain hope?
Of course I wish I had better answers than I always do. Ironically, for the Christian eternal hope is always the easier of the two to point towards: hope in Christ, hope in His saving grace and His promises, the hope of eternal life. Temporally for the Christian - at least, temporally for me - somewhat harder to find. I am subject to the same stresses and strains as all others; I am subject to situations that seem not to change and people that seem impervious to reason and days of the long black tunnel of existence. I can literally go weeks without any wisp of hope clouding the iron-gray sky of daily life.
But we - I - need to figure this out. Life without hope becomes not life at all but existence. And at only existence, we can scarcely seek to achieve the excellence that we are created to do.
Friday, July 06, 2012
Finished!
"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life." - Proverbs 13:12
My book was uploaded for sale last night.
This is one of the most exhausted - and happiest - days of my life. I'm happy for several reasons:
1) I am finally a published author. This is something I have been promising myself I would do for years and have been putting it into my annual goals for at least 7 years. Now, it is done.
2) I completed what I started out to do. This is also something that I have not always been as successful in as I would like to or should have been. Throughout my life lies the wreckage of half started projects, half dreamed dreams. One has finally been completed.
3) I am a writer. This is one that makes me happiest of all. I can legitimately call myself a writer.
4) I found out that I can actually sit down and write a book, one that is coherent, with a point, and is something I can take pride in. I have discovered that this is harder than I thought.
This has been a long process. I found the blog entry from December 2010 that set out the concepts which eventually made formed themselves into a book. That's a long row to hoe - far longer than I would have initially anticipated, about 18 months or so.
Among all the other thanks that need to sprinkled about - Snowflake, Otis, An Fear Glice, The Ravishing Mrs. TB, Songbird, Bogha Frois, and especially God - is the thanks I owe to you, the readers of this blog. Indirectly you have made this all possible - I write daily as much because I know someone is reading as I do an expression of my soul. This day by day exercise has enabled me to write on and press hard when I didn't feel like doing so.
What's next? More books, of course - I realized as I finished this one I have another manuscript (long set aside) that I can work towards printing, and the next book in my series following the first book (already being written) and the one after that (in conceptual phase) and maybe the fantasy trilogy I've always wanted to write and the book about Rebuilding the Ruins from Haggai I have felt a prompting to write and oh yes, the idea I had last night at 3 AM that I had to get up and write down before I forgot it...
Thank you.
My book was uploaded for sale last night.
This is one of the most exhausted - and happiest - days of my life. I'm happy for several reasons:
1) I am finally a published author. This is something I have been promising myself I would do for years and have been putting it into my annual goals for at least 7 years. Now, it is done.
2) I completed what I started out to do. This is also something that I have not always been as successful in as I would like to or should have been. Throughout my life lies the wreckage of half started projects, half dreamed dreams. One has finally been completed.
3) I am a writer. This is one that makes me happiest of all. I can legitimately call myself a writer.
4) I found out that I can actually sit down and write a book, one that is coherent, with a point, and is something I can take pride in. I have discovered that this is harder than I thought.
This has been a long process. I found the blog entry from December 2010 that set out the concepts which eventually made formed themselves into a book. That's a long row to hoe - far longer than I would have initially anticipated, about 18 months or so.
Among all the other thanks that need to sprinkled about - Snowflake, Otis, An Fear Glice, The Ravishing Mrs. TB, Songbird, Bogha Frois, and especially God - is the thanks I owe to you, the readers of this blog. Indirectly you have made this all possible - I write daily as much because I know someone is reading as I do an expression of my soul. This day by day exercise has enabled me to write on and press hard when I didn't feel like doing so.
What's next? More books, of course - I realized as I finished this one I have another manuscript (long set aside) that I can work towards printing, and the next book in my series following the first book (already being written) and the one after that (in conceptual phase) and maybe the fantasy trilogy I've always wanted to write and the book about Rebuilding the Ruins from Haggai I have felt a prompting to write and oh yes, the idea I had last night at 3 AM that I had to get up and write down before I forgot it...
Thank you.
Thursday, July 05, 2012
Solitude
With An Teaglach gone to Old Home, I've been spending a great deal of time by myself.
It's interesting to hear the reactions of others. They seem to fall into one of two categories: either I'm out living it up or I'm incredibly lonely. While option 1 sounds exciting and option 2 sounds depressing, the reality is that neither one is particularly true.
Solitude is not something that frightens on either of two levels. On the first level, it does not frighten me as being without things to do - in this modern age with electronic items and books and writing and 10 projects I always seem to be needing to see to, I hardly find myself at a true loss for something to do.
It's on the second level that it become more interesting, however: the thought of facing long periods of time by one's self.
It's interesting to me that some people cannot deal with the true concept of being alone. I'm not sure whether it's the concept of having no-one around or the more profound concept of coming face to face with your own self, but it seems alarming to many people. Perhaps it is the fear that in being alone, I'll have to start thinking for myself. Perhaps it is the fear that in being alone, I'll have to deal with the thoughts that start to come bubbling to the surface, things that get submerged beneath the incoming tide of daily dealing with people.
Perhaps it is the fear that I'll simply have to think.
Solitude for me is a time to find my bearings, to think deeply on things, to take the time to do the things that I believe are important but somehow convince myself are not important enough to deal with in my usual life. Solitude for me is not an enemy but an old friend, a place retreat to and find strength the face the world.
All solitude ends of course, and I'll not be sorry to see this one go for the reason that I miss The Ravishing Mrs. TB and Na Clann. I'll see them, hear their stories, and become re-immersed in that bustle and general noise level that constitutes my family life.
But inside, part of me will be waiting for the next chance that I have to re-engage with the gentle silence of solitude.
It's interesting to hear the reactions of others. They seem to fall into one of two categories: either I'm out living it up or I'm incredibly lonely. While option 1 sounds exciting and option 2 sounds depressing, the reality is that neither one is particularly true.
Solitude is not something that frightens on either of two levels. On the first level, it does not frighten me as being without things to do - in this modern age with electronic items and books and writing and 10 projects I always seem to be needing to see to, I hardly find myself at a true loss for something to do.
It's on the second level that it become more interesting, however: the thought of facing long periods of time by one's self.
It's interesting to me that some people cannot deal with the true concept of being alone. I'm not sure whether it's the concept of having no-one around or the more profound concept of coming face to face with your own self, but it seems alarming to many people. Perhaps it is the fear that in being alone, I'll have to start thinking for myself. Perhaps it is the fear that in being alone, I'll have to deal with the thoughts that start to come bubbling to the surface, things that get submerged beneath the incoming tide of daily dealing with people.
Perhaps it is the fear that I'll simply have to think.
Solitude for me is a time to find my bearings, to think deeply on things, to take the time to do the things that I believe are important but somehow convince myself are not important enough to deal with in my usual life. Solitude for me is not an enemy but an old friend, a place retreat to and find strength the face the world.
All solitude ends of course, and I'll not be sorry to see this one go for the reason that I miss The Ravishing Mrs. TB and Na Clann. I'll see them, hear their stories, and become re-immersed in that bustle and general noise level that constitutes my family life.
But inside, part of me will be waiting for the next chance that I have to re-engage with the gentle silence of solitude.
Wednesday, July 04, 2012
The Declaration of Independence
The Declaration of Independence: A Transcription
IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.
The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,
When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.--Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.
He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.
He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.
He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:
For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences
For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.
In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.
Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.
We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.
Column 1
Georgia:
Button Gwinnett
Lyman Hall
George Walton
Column 2
North Carolina:
William Hooper
Joseph Hewes
John Penn
South Carolina:
Edward Rutledge
Thomas Heyward, Jr.
Thomas Lynch, Jr.
Arthur Middleton
Column 3
Massachusetts:
John Hancock
Maryland:
Samuel Chase
William Paca
Thomas Stone
Charles Carroll of Carrollton
Virginia:
George Wythe
Richard Henry Lee
Thomas Jefferson
Benjamin Harrison
Thomas Nelson, Jr.
Francis Lightfoot Lee
Carter Braxton
Column 4
Pennsylvania:
Robert Morris
Benjamin Rush
Benjamin Franklin
John Morton
George Clymer
James Smith
George Taylor
James Wilson
George Ross
Delaware:
Caesar Rodney
George Read
Thomas McKean
Column 5
New York:
William Floyd
Philip Livingston
Francis Lewis
Lewis Morris
New Jersey:
Richard Stockton
John Witherspoon
Francis Hopkinson
John Hart
Abraham Clark
Column 6
New Hampshire:
Josiah Bartlett
William Whipple
Massachusetts:
Samuel Adams
John Adams
Robert Treat Paine
Elbridge Gerry
Rhode Island:
Stephen Hopkins
William Ellery
Connecticut:
Roger Sherman
Samuel Huntington
William Williams
Oliver Wolcott
New Hampshire:
Matthew Thornton
- Referenced from www.archives.gov
Tuesday, July 03, 2012
Selfishness and Selflessness
How much of my life is caught up in me!
In spending time today reading through Haggai 1:1-10, I was struck again by God's statement of how the Israelites were more concerned about their own lives than the glorification of God's house and therefore God. God's response was to withdraw His protective hand; the Israelites response was to work even harder to try and provide for themselves rather than see the root of the problem.
Great, I thought. Another interesting lesson from a people in the past about not putting God first. Duly noted. Let's move on.
But then the thought starting percolating in my brain: Putting self first versus putting God first. Suddenly, I had a whole new field to till.
As I sat and thought about it for five minutes, I realized that I am intensely self-focused. At some level in so many parts of my life, my life is about me - especially about how I want people to perceive me. So much of what I do is focused on how I want to be perceived that I eventually become consumed by selfishness at its most basic level: the pursuit of things solely for my benefit. I try and move events to my favor. I try and craft my language and answers to reflect well on me, give myself a certain image I have predetermined in my mind of how I should look. In fact, many activities are undertaken not only because I think I will enjoy them but because I think that they will somehow add to the image of myself in my mind - and how others perceive me.
The result? In behavior I become erratic, trying to hold on to an image that cannot be maintained or letting the image move me to places I should never go. In language and communication, I speak more to be heard rather than hear, and my words become weapons that destroy and hurt, even inadvertently. In activities, I "suddenly" lose interest when the activity doesn't contribute to the mythical image I have constructed for myself.
In clinging to my own self interest, I lose myself.
Which is why (I think) Christ was so insistent that we deny ourselves, take up our cross, and follow Him. Me focused on me creates someone who is following the image of me. Me following Christ, allowing His Spirit to dwell in me and guide my actions, is Christ lived out through the way He created me.
What my image is no longer becomes as important; what Christ's image is in the eyes of others become important, which directs my behavior in ways that are consistent with what I say believe. In language and communication, I communicate what God and Christ have said, not what my opinions are; application becomes based in His word, not in my own ideas. The result is that there is now some grounding for what I speak, not just what sounds wise. In events, I seek to be in them in a way that brings glory to Him not me; I am relieved of the responsiblity of trying to guide them. And in activities, I do what is honoring to God because it honors God; the result is that what I do I do because it is how I'm made and that I enjoy the activities and can enjoy them for what they are and what they bring to my life, not what I think they should make me look like.
There's a first step, of course: agreeing that Christ and His image in me is more important than the image I have created for myself. It's the difference of comparing a sheet of hammered gold and a sheet of toilet paper: both are sheets, but one is far more valuable than the other - and infinitely more enduring.
The question is, am I willing to perceive the true value.
In spending time today reading through Haggai 1:1-10, I was struck again by God's statement of how the Israelites were more concerned about their own lives than the glorification of God's house and therefore God. God's response was to withdraw His protective hand; the Israelites response was to work even harder to try and provide for themselves rather than see the root of the problem.
Great, I thought. Another interesting lesson from a people in the past about not putting God first. Duly noted. Let's move on.
But then the thought starting percolating in my brain: Putting self first versus putting God first. Suddenly, I had a whole new field to till.
As I sat and thought about it for five minutes, I realized that I am intensely self-focused. At some level in so many parts of my life, my life is about me - especially about how I want people to perceive me. So much of what I do is focused on how I want to be perceived that I eventually become consumed by selfishness at its most basic level: the pursuit of things solely for my benefit. I try and move events to my favor. I try and craft my language and answers to reflect well on me, give myself a certain image I have predetermined in my mind of how I should look. In fact, many activities are undertaken not only because I think I will enjoy them but because I think that they will somehow add to the image of myself in my mind - and how others perceive me.
The result? In behavior I become erratic, trying to hold on to an image that cannot be maintained or letting the image move me to places I should never go. In language and communication, I speak more to be heard rather than hear, and my words become weapons that destroy and hurt, even inadvertently. In activities, I "suddenly" lose interest when the activity doesn't contribute to the mythical image I have constructed for myself.
In clinging to my own self interest, I lose myself.
Which is why (I think) Christ was so insistent that we deny ourselves, take up our cross, and follow Him. Me focused on me creates someone who is following the image of me. Me following Christ, allowing His Spirit to dwell in me and guide my actions, is Christ lived out through the way He created me.
What my image is no longer becomes as important; what Christ's image is in the eyes of others become important, which directs my behavior in ways that are consistent with what I say believe. In language and communication, I communicate what God and Christ have said, not what my opinions are; application becomes based in His word, not in my own ideas. The result is that there is now some grounding for what I speak, not just what sounds wise. In events, I seek to be in them in a way that brings glory to Him not me; I am relieved of the responsiblity of trying to guide them. And in activities, I do what is honoring to God because it honors God; the result is that what I do I do because it is how I'm made and that I enjoy the activities and can enjoy them for what they are and what they bring to my life, not what I think they should make me look like.
There's a first step, of course: agreeing that Christ and His image in me is more important than the image I have created for myself. It's the difference of comparing a sheet of hammered gold and a sheet of toilet paper: both are sheets, but one is far more valuable than the other - and infinitely more enduring.
The question is, am I willing to perceive the true value.
Monday, July 02, 2012
Writers and Copy Editors
I've been mulling over my last post about Doing What You're Not. I recevied some thought provoking feedback from friends and even some though provoking feedback from myself, but found things most clearly defined for me by Stephen King in his book On Writing.
On Writing, for those that have never read it, is a combination autobiography/writing guide from one of the US's most prolific and published authors. Mr. King starts the book with his autobiography to demonstrate how he got his start on writing and got to where he is, then provides a guide on writing, then slips back into an autobiography about his life post-accident and how writing helped him move through that (which turns out to be the book On Writing).
In discussing the creative process, Mr. King does a good a job as any I've read (let's be fair: better than most) about discussing the basics of writing, especially in a section that is about a third of the book and shorter than many whole books on aspects of writing but probably the best and most concise I've read.
In one section - on proofing - he makes the offhanded comment about correcting a comma, saying that although there are copyeditors it's something he should take care of. The sentence just sat there, hanging in mid-air as I looked at it. Suddenly it became clear.
There are two kinds of people in lots of things: writers and copyeditors. Writers may generate the great ideas and create the text, but their primary job is not to verify that everything is perfect (it's better, of course, and makes you look more professional but is not their primary job). Copyeditors are the ones that catch errors, correct, make suggestions to the phrasing and words and punctuation. Writers create, copyeditors make sure the creation is linguistically and grammatically correct.
One can't be the other - and shouldn't. Writers trying to copyedit probably drive themselves batty; copyeditors trying to write (unless they're writers as well) may not have the creative spark. But each of them works together in concert for a marvelous whole: a book which is both well written and grammatically correct.
Can one adapt to the other? I'm not sure. I would think a writer could do a copyeditor's work, but for myself I find it slows me down a great deal, and for me writing is about catching the flow of ideas as they spill out. I wonder as well for the detail oriented if they could write with speed, or would the inner corrective catch every error as it came out, preventing the full idea from becoming real.
But more importantly for me: if one realizes one is a writer and not a copyeditor, can one find a way back to the writing side of the page?
On Writing, for those that have never read it, is a combination autobiography/writing guide from one of the US's most prolific and published authors. Mr. King starts the book with his autobiography to demonstrate how he got his start on writing and got to where he is, then provides a guide on writing, then slips back into an autobiography about his life post-accident and how writing helped him move through that (which turns out to be the book On Writing).
In discussing the creative process, Mr. King does a good a job as any I've read (let's be fair: better than most) about discussing the basics of writing, especially in a section that is about a third of the book and shorter than many whole books on aspects of writing but probably the best and most concise I've read.
In one section - on proofing - he makes the offhanded comment about correcting a comma, saying that although there are copyeditors it's something he should take care of. The sentence just sat there, hanging in mid-air as I looked at it. Suddenly it became clear.
There are two kinds of people in lots of things: writers and copyeditors. Writers may generate the great ideas and create the text, but their primary job is not to verify that everything is perfect (it's better, of course, and makes you look more professional but is not their primary job). Copyeditors are the ones that catch errors, correct, make suggestions to the phrasing and words and punctuation. Writers create, copyeditors make sure the creation is linguistically and grammatically correct.
One can't be the other - and shouldn't. Writers trying to copyedit probably drive themselves batty; copyeditors trying to write (unless they're writers as well) may not have the creative spark. But each of them works together in concert for a marvelous whole: a book which is both well written and grammatically correct.
Can one adapt to the other? I'm not sure. I would think a writer could do a copyeditor's work, but for myself I find it slows me down a great deal, and for me writing is about catching the flow of ideas as they spill out. I wonder as well for the detail oriented if they could write with speed, or would the inner corrective catch every error as it came out, preventing the full idea from becoming real.
But more importantly for me: if one realizes one is a writer and not a copyeditor, can one find a way back to the writing side of the page?
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Doing What You're Not
I had another one of those lovely conversations with Bogha Frois last night which comes precisely at the time I need it - and sparks a massive amount of thinking afterwards.
No lies - this was a long and hard week, long to the point that on Tuesday it seemed like it should have been Wednesday. Virtually the last thing that happened before I left was the discovery of an error which had been reviewed and re-reviewed 15 times. All the old accusations of failing and not paying attention washed over me like a tsunami, and I crawled home dragging worse than I had all week.
And then I talked to Bogha Frois, and found that she had a week just like it. There is a peculiar comfort in shared misery.
As she walked me her through week - rising frustrations, rising disconnections, changes in physical well-being and mental attitude - it was like looking into a mirror and hearing myself speak. She put into words everything that I had been feeling - everything that I have inside but could not express.
Overriding everything for both of us was this huge wall of frustration, this wall we simply cannot get over. It's as if the cliff is crumbling behind you and the wall is too high in front of you and there is simply no place to turn: you do not want to plunge to your doom, but neither do you want to be pressed up to a wall, unable to do anything except beat your head against it.
And then the thought occurred to me as I got ready to make cheese this morning: I'm not doing what I am.
I am simply not a detail person. Yes, I understand that we all have to have some attention to detail (in writing and cheesemaking as in all else) and of course it's easier when it's something you're interested in. But I'm not the kind of person that happily sits at a desk, reviewing and re-reviewing, reference and cross-referencing. I take little joy in the thought that I have corrected an error.
What am I then? I'm a creative person - a broad brush painter, a starter. I love to create things. I love to see the possibilities. I love to make things - things of beauty, things that are of use to others.
And like a smack on the side of the head, all became clear. My frustration mounts because I'm not doing that which I do best. The frustration I feel is because I am not creating or making anything; instead, I'm correcting and cross-referencing.
The result? Not only everything mentioned above, but an additional factor that I seem to be losing interest in almost everything I like to do. Career has become like the Ring in The Lord of the Rings in Frodo's mind: A burning wheel of fire dominating everything.
What to do? I'm not sure. Creative careers are surely much harder to come by than those of execution and detail are required.
But there's another simple fact. Doing what you are not is like putting a freshwater fish into seawater: it will not survive long.
No lies - this was a long and hard week, long to the point that on Tuesday it seemed like it should have been Wednesday. Virtually the last thing that happened before I left was the discovery of an error which had been reviewed and re-reviewed 15 times. All the old accusations of failing and not paying attention washed over me like a tsunami, and I crawled home dragging worse than I had all week.
And then I talked to Bogha Frois, and found that she had a week just like it. There is a peculiar comfort in shared misery.
As she walked me her through week - rising frustrations, rising disconnections, changes in physical well-being and mental attitude - it was like looking into a mirror and hearing myself speak. She put into words everything that I had been feeling - everything that I have inside but could not express.
Overriding everything for both of us was this huge wall of frustration, this wall we simply cannot get over. It's as if the cliff is crumbling behind you and the wall is too high in front of you and there is simply no place to turn: you do not want to plunge to your doom, but neither do you want to be pressed up to a wall, unable to do anything except beat your head against it.
And then the thought occurred to me as I got ready to make cheese this morning: I'm not doing what I am.
I am simply not a detail person. Yes, I understand that we all have to have some attention to detail (in writing and cheesemaking as in all else) and of course it's easier when it's something you're interested in. But I'm not the kind of person that happily sits at a desk, reviewing and re-reviewing, reference and cross-referencing. I take little joy in the thought that I have corrected an error.
What am I then? I'm a creative person - a broad brush painter, a starter. I love to create things. I love to see the possibilities. I love to make things - things of beauty, things that are of use to others.
And like a smack on the side of the head, all became clear. My frustration mounts because I'm not doing that which I do best. The frustration I feel is because I am not creating or making anything; instead, I'm correcting and cross-referencing.
The result? Not only everything mentioned above, but an additional factor that I seem to be losing interest in almost everything I like to do. Career has become like the Ring in The Lord of the Rings in Frodo's mind: A burning wheel of fire dominating everything.
What to do? I'm not sure. Creative careers are surely much harder to come by than those of execution and detail are required.
But there's another simple fact. Doing what you are not is like putting a freshwater fish into seawater: it will not survive long.
Friday, June 29, 2012
Failures
Failures bother me. Personal failures bother me more. Repeat personal failures bother me the most.
Nothing speaks to me more of my sin nature than the fact that there are just some things that I repeatedly fail at - not the sort of thing that is tried and not accomplished, but the sort of thing that is done and shouldn't be. For those who are Christian, it's sin.
It bothers me but not on the level that it really should.
The thing that does bother me is that it is a sign of personal weakness, a lack of self control. Especially returning to the same issues over and over again. It serves as a reminder that I have not overcome basic character flaws and not self disciplined myself enough.
But the thing that doesn't bother me - and should - is how much it says about how far I haven't come yet.
Repeat personal failures should be treated by me as one of the greatest learning tools I have available to myself. They are the road signs of things I have not advanced in but should have. They demonstrate where I am most vulnerable. They show where sin resides most deeply in my soul, the ingrained portions I cannot or will not address.
They are the road map to all the unlit portions of my soul. And seeing them, knowing they are there, means that I have grasped where my limitations lie, because I cannot advance farther than my greatest personal failure.
The question is am I more committed to dealing with them - and the pain and discomfort that will cause - than I am committed to becoming comfortable with them.
Nothing speaks to me more of my sin nature than the fact that there are just some things that I repeatedly fail at - not the sort of thing that is tried and not accomplished, but the sort of thing that is done and shouldn't be. For those who are Christian, it's sin.
It bothers me but not on the level that it really should.
The thing that does bother me is that it is a sign of personal weakness, a lack of self control. Especially returning to the same issues over and over again. It serves as a reminder that I have not overcome basic character flaws and not self disciplined myself enough.
But the thing that doesn't bother me - and should - is how much it says about how far I haven't come yet.
Repeat personal failures should be treated by me as one of the greatest learning tools I have available to myself. They are the road signs of things I have not advanced in but should have. They demonstrate where I am most vulnerable. They show where sin resides most deeply in my soul, the ingrained portions I cannot or will not address.
They are the road map to all the unlit portions of my soul. And seeing them, knowing they are there, means that I have grasped where my limitations lie, because I cannot advance farther than my greatest personal failure.
The question is am I more committed to dealing with them - and the pain and discomfort that will cause - than I am committed to becoming comfortable with them.
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Editing
I'm now on the approxatimately 501st copy of editing work for my book. In long years of reading and writing and doing documentation professionally, this is one of the longest and most frustrating things I've ever done.
I've printed out hardcopy and edited that. I've reviewed it online and edited that. I've reviewed online, made additional changes I located and then edited that. And still, the nagging little errors miss my every sweep, ready to leap in and show themelves after I think I'm finished.
Part of me just wants to surrender and give up, to say "That's enough - you've surely caught 99% of the errors. A mis-spelled word isn't going to make or break you." But as soon as that comes up, the very first time I catch one more error, I immediately switch to "What else did I miss?" and get ready to re-route the thing for formatting and review.
In an odd way this is highly symbolic of the work that I do right now - sending documents around for review and signature, learning (the hard way) that printing out a hard copy is truly the only way to review, catching something I should have changed after I signed it. Rushing there gives me no more greater speed than in my personal life, apparently.
It strikes as remarkable because this is really the sort of thing people think they want: clean or well assembled work or documents, 100% correct, pleasing to the eye. What they fail to realize is that such work takes a lot of attention to detail and hard work (those "Thankless Tasks" I have written of before) is work that is by and large unseen and unappreciated.
Not true in this case of course - the end result is something which I am doing for myself, which I will at least reap the benefits of having accomplished instead of yet another document that is essentially invisible.
Still, I have to wonder: if we held this level of expectation out to everyone - if we expected everyone to turn out high quality work - would most people be willing to make the commitment and effort?
I've printed out hardcopy and edited that. I've reviewed it online and edited that. I've reviewed online, made additional changes I located and then edited that. And still, the nagging little errors miss my every sweep, ready to leap in and show themelves after I think I'm finished.
Part of me just wants to surrender and give up, to say "That's enough - you've surely caught 99% of the errors. A mis-spelled word isn't going to make or break you." But as soon as that comes up, the very first time I catch one more error, I immediately switch to "What else did I miss?" and get ready to re-route the thing for formatting and review.
In an odd way this is highly symbolic of the work that I do right now - sending documents around for review and signature, learning (the hard way) that printing out a hard copy is truly the only way to review, catching something I should have changed after I signed it. Rushing there gives me no more greater speed than in my personal life, apparently.
It strikes as remarkable because this is really the sort of thing people think they want: clean or well assembled work or documents, 100% correct, pleasing to the eye. What they fail to realize is that such work takes a lot of attention to detail and hard work (those "Thankless Tasks" I have written of before) is work that is by and large unseen and unappreciated.
Not true in this case of course - the end result is something which I am doing for myself, which I will at least reap the benefits of having accomplished instead of yet another document that is essentially invisible.
Still, I have to wonder: if we held this level of expectation out to everyone - if we expected everyone to turn out high quality work - would most people be willing to make the commitment and effort?
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Signatures
A signature is more than just our name:
It is an expression of us, of how we perceive
and present ourselves.
Cramped and small, flowing and large,
they are us - or the us that many will perceive.
There are electronic signatures, 'tis true,
but they are no more true signatures
than a typed name is an autograph.
When a signature is applied
it is an approval,
a guarantee,
a statement of our involvement.
When we are gone afterwards -
moved on, left the building, even left the world -
our signature remains as a testimony to our presence.
When our life is done and those who come after us look,
where will they see our signatures?
What will the signature say about us, about what we believed,
about what we supported and who we were?
Do we seek to sign that which truly matters,
or have our signatures become no more than another set of words
written because we have to?
It is an expression of us, of how we perceive
and present ourselves.
Cramped and small, flowing and large,
they are us - or the us that many will perceive.
There are electronic signatures, 'tis true,
but they are no more true signatures
than a typed name is an autograph.
When a signature is applied
it is an approval,
a guarantee,
a statement of our involvement.
When we are gone afterwards -
moved on, left the building, even left the world -
our signature remains as a testimony to our presence.
When our life is done and those who come after us look,
where will they see our signatures?
What will the signature say about us, about what we believed,
about what we supported and who we were?
Do we seek to sign that which truly matters,
or have our signatures become no more than another set of words
written because we have to?
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Monday, June 25, 2012
Doing It For Me
One of the great struggles I have always had in my life is simply being consistent with anything, continuing to follow it, staying with it. I have picked up half a hundred ideas or things to do in my time; most of them fall by the wayside of life as I move on.
Why is this? It's not as if these things were harmful and needed to be dropped, nor that didn't want to persevere in them. It's just that, well, the motivation seemed to go away.
An example: I have always struggled with exercise in my life. At best I was semi-physically motivated as a child and no team sport player. This has dogged me in my later years, especially when physical activity is almost a necessity for health. I have spurts: I go for a while, seem to reach a point where I feel I've accomplished something, then suddenly stop. Every time I try to pick it back up it seems to be more difficult to do so.
Why is this? It's not as if I don't know the benefits of exercise. It's not as if I don't feel better after I do it. But for some reason, all of these points fail to motivate me on.
Then it occurred to me yesterday: who am I doing this for?
The reality came that more often than not, I do these things not for myself, but for the notice they get me.
I've written before how motivated I am by the approval of others. I found a new layer of it yesterday as I considered the reasons I chose to do so many things: it was not just because they were interesting (they were) or I liked to do them (I did), it was also because it was a topic of novelty and discussion among others, an attention-getter for me. The problem, of course, is that when the attention goes away, so does the reason for doing them.
We cannot ever really succeed or make good in anything that we do not do for ourselves. That's a bold statement I know, and might be construed as selfishness by some. But the reality is that unless we have a personal interest and stake in anything - not based on outside circumstances or outside people - we will eventually stop doing those things because the reward is not what we need to keep us going when the going gets difficult - and at some point, it will.
I confess that this is a difficult thing for me - the idea of self-committing to a goal and seeking the reward when measured against myself rather than any outside influence. It's not something I think I have done before, at least not regularly: so many other activities of my life seemed to be done to please or get the attention of someone else.
But difficult or not, it is time to change. I cannot continue to dip my toes in the water of life and pull them away when others leave the pool, looking for where they will go next so I can dip my toes in too. It's time to decide what rivers to go in myself and take the plunge. If others come too, great: we'll float together. But if they don't, that still cannot influence my thought to stay in the river and ride it once I'm in.
To do the first is to simply become a copy of what's desirable and popular. To do the second is to become the individual one was meant to become.
Why is this? It's not as if these things were harmful and needed to be dropped, nor that didn't want to persevere in them. It's just that, well, the motivation seemed to go away.
An example: I have always struggled with exercise in my life. At best I was semi-physically motivated as a child and no team sport player. This has dogged me in my later years, especially when physical activity is almost a necessity for health. I have spurts: I go for a while, seem to reach a point where I feel I've accomplished something, then suddenly stop. Every time I try to pick it back up it seems to be more difficult to do so.
Why is this? It's not as if I don't know the benefits of exercise. It's not as if I don't feel better after I do it. But for some reason, all of these points fail to motivate me on.
Then it occurred to me yesterday: who am I doing this for?
The reality came that more often than not, I do these things not for myself, but for the notice they get me.
I've written before how motivated I am by the approval of others. I found a new layer of it yesterday as I considered the reasons I chose to do so many things: it was not just because they were interesting (they were) or I liked to do them (I did), it was also because it was a topic of novelty and discussion among others, an attention-getter for me. The problem, of course, is that when the attention goes away, so does the reason for doing them.
We cannot ever really succeed or make good in anything that we do not do for ourselves. That's a bold statement I know, and might be construed as selfishness by some. But the reality is that unless we have a personal interest and stake in anything - not based on outside circumstances or outside people - we will eventually stop doing those things because the reward is not what we need to keep us going when the going gets difficult - and at some point, it will.
I confess that this is a difficult thing for me - the idea of self-committing to a goal and seeking the reward when measured against myself rather than any outside influence. It's not something I think I have done before, at least not regularly: so many other activities of my life seemed to be done to please or get the attention of someone else.
But difficult or not, it is time to change. I cannot continue to dip my toes in the water of life and pull them away when others leave the pool, looking for where they will go next so I can dip my toes in too. It's time to decide what rivers to go in myself and take the plunge. If others come too, great: we'll float together. But if they don't, that still cannot influence my thought to stay in the river and ride it once I'm in.
To do the first is to simply become a copy of what's desirable and popular. To do the second is to become the individual one was meant to become.
Friday, June 22, 2012
Permission
What is the first step to changing our life or anything in our life? Is there a mystical aura that suddenly arises, or do the clouds form themselves into words? Does our dog look up and us and say in an audible voice "Go West, Young Man"?
I ask the question because I am person who on one hand throughly supports the idea of change and growth while on the other hand seem to have a less than stellar track record on the subject. Why is that?
Motivation has something to do with it, of course. Without motivation nothing will happen; without motivation that is not tied something more enduring than "I hope someone notices this" nothing will change for the long term.
But even motivation is an effect, not a cause. There is something deeper still, something buried in the depths of self that give rise to motivation.
And then somewhere on my morning bike ride this morning the answer came blazing down to me: we have to give ourselves permission to grow. We have to become more comitted to the growth that to the comfort of our current self. And we need to accept that we have to choose this ourselves instead of waiting for permission from someone else.
The first two thoughts are ones I've read and seen before, so there was no great shock there. The third one nearly plowed me into a parked car.
We need to accept that we have to choose change for ourselves instead of waiting for permission from someone else.
For myself, I am a man of permissions. I work in an industry of permissions, of things that can and can't be done or there are consequences. And too often I've worked where decisions cannot be made unless decisions are made by others, sometimes decisions which almost run out the clock in making them.
The thing with waiting for permission instead of acting is that sometimes the affirmation comes to late: the window for completing something is gone, or the opportunity has passed. You would have said yes, but you were forced to wait.
That may be as it is in our professional lives. My fear is that I have allowed it to invade my personal life as well - for far too long.
It's almost as if I'm looking for permission - indeed, for approval - from someone else to make changes, looking for a sign of approval, a hint of disapproval, before I move in a direction. Like a soothsayer of old, I watch the flock of birds looking for the slightest variation in flight pattern to determine the course of the future.
But reality is different. Reality is that other than those close to you, most people don't care one way or the other. In fact, in some cases it serves their cause more to have you do nothing than to have you change. But we (at least I) continue to pursue the permission that will not come in hopes that I'll get that spark of affirmation that says "Yes. Go ahead. Do that."
The cure? As hard is it will be for me to implement, the cure is simply to decide that I will no longer wait for permission to change, to grow. There is no permission or approval come - except if it comes from myself. If it is a situation where I need the permissions of others fine, I'll get that. But for much of the growth and change I need to do as an individual, there is no permission from others. There is only the acceptance that I need permission from myself.
Change begins in ourselves the day we decide we have had enough.
I ask the question because I am person who on one hand throughly supports the idea of change and growth while on the other hand seem to have a less than stellar track record on the subject. Why is that?
Motivation has something to do with it, of course. Without motivation nothing will happen; without motivation that is not tied something more enduring than "I hope someone notices this" nothing will change for the long term.
But even motivation is an effect, not a cause. There is something deeper still, something buried in the depths of self that give rise to motivation.
And then somewhere on my morning bike ride this morning the answer came blazing down to me: we have to give ourselves permission to grow. We have to become more comitted to the growth that to the comfort of our current self. And we need to accept that we have to choose this ourselves instead of waiting for permission from someone else.
The first two thoughts are ones I've read and seen before, so there was no great shock there. The third one nearly plowed me into a parked car.
We need to accept that we have to choose change for ourselves instead of waiting for permission from someone else.
For myself, I am a man of permissions. I work in an industry of permissions, of things that can and can't be done or there are consequences. And too often I've worked where decisions cannot be made unless decisions are made by others, sometimes decisions which almost run out the clock in making them.
The thing with waiting for permission instead of acting is that sometimes the affirmation comes to late: the window for completing something is gone, or the opportunity has passed. You would have said yes, but you were forced to wait.
That may be as it is in our professional lives. My fear is that I have allowed it to invade my personal life as well - for far too long.
It's almost as if I'm looking for permission - indeed, for approval - from someone else to make changes, looking for a sign of approval, a hint of disapproval, before I move in a direction. Like a soothsayer of old, I watch the flock of birds looking for the slightest variation in flight pattern to determine the course of the future.
But reality is different. Reality is that other than those close to you, most people don't care one way or the other. In fact, in some cases it serves their cause more to have you do nothing than to have you change. But we (at least I) continue to pursue the permission that will not come in hopes that I'll get that spark of affirmation that says "Yes. Go ahead. Do that."
The cure? As hard is it will be for me to implement, the cure is simply to decide that I will no longer wait for permission to change, to grow. There is no permission or approval come - except if it comes from myself. If it is a situation where I need the permissions of others fine, I'll get that. But for much of the growth and change I need to do as an individual, there is no permission from others. There is only the acceptance that I need permission from myself.
Change begins in ourselves the day we decide we have had enough.
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Good At, Love, Worth Doing
"Do what you are good at, do what you love, and do what you believe is worth doing." - Sam Calagione, Brewing Up A Business: Adventures in Entrepreneurship
Economic climates which are not conducive to considering second careers are never the best time to start thinking about one. There's nothing like looking at the closures and layoff in your own field, the economic mayhem around you, and then saying, in a weak and wavering voice "Well, maybe it's time to..." From personal experience I can state that security is something that you don't really miss until it's gone. Feelings of strength and security and a sometimes reckless you have wash away with the realization that it was too often built on assumptions - the first assumption being that the pesky job you may not be crazy about would continue to generate income.
The counterpoint to this thought is exactly what you are doing. It's one thing to argue safety and security; it's another to argue them in the context of facing something which could just simply be boring and fruitless or at worst be destroying your physical and mental health. In such situations, the concept of safety and security dips below the horizon, beaten down by the intense sun of reality which too often feels like a physical presence leaving you hot, drained, and desperately in need of a cool drink called "something I can look forward to".
And then I read something like the quote above - do what you are good at, do what you love, do what you believe in - and suddenly I'm thrown back into the quandary that (it seems) I've been dealing with my whole adult working life: Do I love what I do? Have I ever loved what I did? Was I good at it? Have I done anything that I believe is worth doing?
Looking at my own career history, I can pick out elements of all of those, even with jobs I didn't like all that much. The things I loved doing didn't always pay well and maybe I wasn't that good at it. The jobs I liked okay I may have been good at but didn't love and probably didn't believe they were worth doing. Most unusually, the jobs that I perhaps felt were the worst all, that I didn't love but may have been good at, were some of the jobs that (on a macro level) were jobs that needed to be done.
So the question remains, is such a concept even valid? Is it better to do something worth doing, maybe even something you're okay at if you don't love it? Does loving something overcome the need of it being worth doing? (Being good at something is partially natural talent and partially practice; given time most people can become passably skilled at most things so I would argue it's the least of the three factors.) I don't doubt that the combination of those three things are what brings the ultimate satisfaction and ultimate success to individuals and companies that find them. The question is, how do you find it?
And, if you figure out what it is, how do you go about doing it?
Economic climates which are not conducive to considering second careers are never the best time to start thinking about one. There's nothing like looking at the closures and layoff in your own field, the economic mayhem around you, and then saying, in a weak and wavering voice "Well, maybe it's time to..." From personal experience I can state that security is something that you don't really miss until it's gone. Feelings of strength and security and a sometimes reckless you have wash away with the realization that it was too often built on assumptions - the first assumption being that the pesky job you may not be crazy about would continue to generate income.
The counterpoint to this thought is exactly what you are doing. It's one thing to argue safety and security; it's another to argue them in the context of facing something which could just simply be boring and fruitless or at worst be destroying your physical and mental health. In such situations, the concept of safety and security dips below the horizon, beaten down by the intense sun of reality which too often feels like a physical presence leaving you hot, drained, and desperately in need of a cool drink called "something I can look forward to".
And then I read something like the quote above - do what you are good at, do what you love, do what you believe in - and suddenly I'm thrown back into the quandary that (it seems) I've been dealing with my whole adult working life: Do I love what I do? Have I ever loved what I did? Was I good at it? Have I done anything that I believe is worth doing?
Looking at my own career history, I can pick out elements of all of those, even with jobs I didn't like all that much. The things I loved doing didn't always pay well and maybe I wasn't that good at it. The jobs I liked okay I may have been good at but didn't love and probably didn't believe they were worth doing. Most unusually, the jobs that I perhaps felt were the worst all, that I didn't love but may have been good at, were some of the jobs that (on a macro level) were jobs that needed to be done.
So the question remains, is such a concept even valid? Is it better to do something worth doing, maybe even something you're okay at if you don't love it? Does loving something overcome the need of it being worth doing? (Being good at something is partially natural talent and partially practice; given time most people can become passably skilled at most things so I would argue it's the least of the three factors.) I don't doubt that the combination of those three things are what brings the ultimate satisfaction and ultimate success to individuals and companies that find them. The question is, how do you find it?
And, if you figure out what it is, how do you go about doing it?
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Ineffective
Fighting with ineffectiveness this week.
Frankly, I feel ineffective. Every week I convince myself by the end that the next week will be better, that I just have to dig deeper and try harder. And every week I find that have either lied to myself or events are not what they seem.
In order to be effective, one has to be able to point to something that one has changed for the better, something that one has done that has had an impact. The question is, what does one do when the impacts one seem to fall through the pavement as the cracks get wider?
I keep trying to find bedrock, the bottom, something that will not collapse under my weight as I rest it. But everywhere I seem to put it, I hear the sound of cracking ice starting to break.
So then I have to ask: if it's ineffectiveness I feel, is it because of me - or because I simply can't be effective at all in this situation?
The two are different of course. In one, it's not the situation that is the issue but it is myself. In the other, it is not I that have failed but rather the situation.
How am I going to resolve this? I honestly have no idea. There is no easy out here. At best, things keep going and I receive the inevitable blame for anything that happens; at worst....well, at worst I find myself in a situation I've been in before.
When everything seems broken, how do you find the one thing you can fix? And even if you find it, does fixing it make the difference you think it should?
Frankly, I feel ineffective. Every week I convince myself by the end that the next week will be better, that I just have to dig deeper and try harder. And every week I find that have either lied to myself or events are not what they seem.
In order to be effective, one has to be able to point to something that one has changed for the better, something that one has done that has had an impact. The question is, what does one do when the impacts one seem to fall through the pavement as the cracks get wider?
I keep trying to find bedrock, the bottom, something that will not collapse under my weight as I rest it. But everywhere I seem to put it, I hear the sound of cracking ice starting to break.
So then I have to ask: if it's ineffectiveness I feel, is it because of me - or because I simply can't be effective at all in this situation?
The two are different of course. In one, it's not the situation that is the issue but it is myself. In the other, it is not I that have failed but rather the situation.
How am I going to resolve this? I honestly have no idea. There is no easy out here. At best, things keep going and I receive the inevitable blame for anything that happens; at worst....well, at worst I find myself in a situation I've been in before.
When everything seems broken, how do you find the one thing you can fix? And even if you find it, does fixing it make the difference you think it should?
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Motivation and Mediocrity III
How can we use our own motivation to motivate others?
This is the challenge that I find for myself every day: not just that I need to motivate myself, but that as a manager I need to motivate those under and around me. Motivation is always easy when things are going well and people are happy, of course. The unfortunate part is that very few of us dwell in that particular world.
Recall that motivation stems from a motive, really something which causes someone to act. It's often difficult to give myself a reason to act - it can be ten times more difficult to get others to act. Why? Because in the end, I know what motivates me. It can be very difficult to know what will motivate others.
There's a short cut of course, one that authorities like to use all the time. It's called the "You will do this" scenario, in which an individual is told to do something or something less than desirable will happen. It certain is appropriate in some cases - traffic laws come to mind - but it hardly lends itself to creating highly motivated people. It is simply a fact that when I am forced to do something - or when I feel forced to do something - at some level I simply will not put some aspect of my best effort into it.
There is an answer, of course, even if I'm to dim to see it. Some people simply have the ability to motivate others. I've participated in being in such groups, even if I am seldom able to recreate the experience myself for others. If I had to describe it, I would say that it is the sense that what I am doing is contributing to a greater cause, some greater good, or that somehow the efforts that I am putting in now will result in a better person than I am now.
One thing that leaps to mind as I write that is that good motivators have the ability to paint a picture, to make something real. Be it a future day, be it an output, even be it an idealized picture of myself, the best motivators bring to life a picture of what is possible - indeed, what is probable if only one will rededicate one's self.
But great motivators of others also have something else: a track record of success. People believe in their words and visions and become motivated because this person has accomplished such things in the past. Even if they themselves are not physically leading, their accomplishments serve as a sort of virtual road map of what is possible. When this is combined with words and visions, it can be well nigh impossible.
But that again points the focus back to where it should probably be: myself. Others cannot be motivated by me unless: 1) I am motivated; 2) I have a vision and can communicate it; and 3) I have credibility that this vision is possible based on my past. Without any one of these three points, I simply will become one more person in a long line of individuals that people have heard speak before - and then they write them off.
Which, I suppose, explains the issue of "You will do this" as a common form of motivation. Authoritarianism is always the easier road than self examination.
This is the challenge that I find for myself every day: not just that I need to motivate myself, but that as a manager I need to motivate those under and around me. Motivation is always easy when things are going well and people are happy, of course. The unfortunate part is that very few of us dwell in that particular world.
Recall that motivation stems from a motive, really something which causes someone to act. It's often difficult to give myself a reason to act - it can be ten times more difficult to get others to act. Why? Because in the end, I know what motivates me. It can be very difficult to know what will motivate others.
There's a short cut of course, one that authorities like to use all the time. It's called the "You will do this" scenario, in which an individual is told to do something or something less than desirable will happen. It certain is appropriate in some cases - traffic laws come to mind - but it hardly lends itself to creating highly motivated people. It is simply a fact that when I am forced to do something - or when I feel forced to do something - at some level I simply will not put some aspect of my best effort into it.
There is an answer, of course, even if I'm to dim to see it. Some people simply have the ability to motivate others. I've participated in being in such groups, even if I am seldom able to recreate the experience myself for others. If I had to describe it, I would say that it is the sense that what I am doing is contributing to a greater cause, some greater good, or that somehow the efforts that I am putting in now will result in a better person than I am now.
One thing that leaps to mind as I write that is that good motivators have the ability to paint a picture, to make something real. Be it a future day, be it an output, even be it an idealized picture of myself, the best motivators bring to life a picture of what is possible - indeed, what is probable if only one will rededicate one's self.
But great motivators of others also have something else: a track record of success. People believe in their words and visions and become motivated because this person has accomplished such things in the past. Even if they themselves are not physically leading, their accomplishments serve as a sort of virtual road map of what is possible. When this is combined with words and visions, it can be well nigh impossible.
But that again points the focus back to where it should probably be: myself. Others cannot be motivated by me unless: 1) I am motivated; 2) I have a vision and can communicate it; and 3) I have credibility that this vision is possible based on my past. Without any one of these three points, I simply will become one more person in a long line of individuals that people have heard speak before - and then they write them off.
Which, I suppose, explains the issue of "You will do this" as a common form of motivation. Authoritarianism is always the easier road than self examination.
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