This past weekend I went to visit my former boss who retired earlier this year.
The drive was approximately 2 hours North/Northwest of New Home 2.0, over the major river in this area, past a port or two, and into a lovely green part of the world largely forgotten by almost everyone but its inhabitants and logging companies. It was not "remote" in the sense that it is far away, but it is in a valley isolated from freeways, towns, and tourist destinations. Likely no-one goes there except for a purpose - I, myself, would not have found the place without a last minute text letting me know to go beyond where The Computer In My Pocket's instructions ended.
It was not quite the end of the world, but I think you can see the end from there.
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I have, on the whole, been blessed with a series of excellent bosses.
I use the word "boss" by choice, both because that is the word I started with all those years ago with my first job in high school and partially because it covers any range of titles (from supervisor up to VP or Head) that had authority over me. "Manager" truly is a job title, not a necessarily a role, and the more modern phrase of "People Leader" seems precisely wrong: not all people are leaders, and not all people leaders lead their people, or at least, lead their people well.
My bosses have indeed been excellent bosses overall, full of knowledge and insight and understanding - and where they were not excellent bosses (or even good ones), they were generally good human beings outside of their role as my boss, which helped ease the strain a bit when friction arrived; if nothing else, you can find some humanizing element to center on in difficult conversations. From all of them I have learned - mostly good things both in terms of knowledge and wisdom, from others simply how not to be that kind of boss. Most of them lightened the load where they could, taught me things that only experience can teach one in an industry where the practice is as much an art as a science, and most importantly taught me in turn how to (hopefully) be a good boss as well.
Much like any teacher in school, in some way they live on through me (although, to my knowledge, all of my current industry bosses are still with us).
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We had the most of splendid of visits. She showed me her property with its various outbuildings and places she practices her various arts (now much more full time), and her extensive garden (the picture above is what she sent me home with, which represents. 0.00000001% of her output: cabbage, three kinds of onions, three kinds of garlic, shallots, and jams and salsas).
We chatted about work, both over the lunch that she just "whipped up" of onion soup made with fresh onions and shallots from the garden and homemade bread and later after the tour. She offered some wisdom, gave some suggestions, listened to me kvetch about the current state of work affairs - which has not really changed since she left (of course they have not) - and gave me insight into thinking more about what my own next few years might look like - if there is an advertisement for "retire as soon as feasibly possible", she and her husband are prime examples.
I am grateful, of course. Grateful for the conversation, grateful for the gifts (sauerkraut is now in the crock and cabbage soup has been made and I now have garlic to plant for Winter) - but mostly thankful for her kindness and guidance and, by extension, the kindness of all the bosses I have had.
You really never know how each and every relationship will influence those on the other side of it, even years later.
Man, talk about unexpected plenty eh? "People Leader"........can hear the Nelson "Hah Hah" meme over that title TB. I can remember my first boss in my first "real" job with Uncle Sam, he'd sit me down and ask a few questions about what I had done and what I could do differently to improve, no yelling, no histrionics. His take on issues/matters was measured and appreciated by me. Did you take baked goods when visiting your former jefe TB? I read somewhere that's de rigueur when visiting former bosses, perhaps Emily Post?...........:)
ReplyDeleteNylon12, I took white wine, which I know is a favorite.
DeleteI think "people leader" is meant to somehow erase titles and differences, to make us feel like we are on the same level, which we clearly are not.
I made cabbage soup last night with the other head of cabbage. It was delicious.
I always had good bosses, at least when I hired on. But the engineering field was transitioning from an essential part of any company to just another resource that had potential to be farmed out or traded as one saw fit. Thus for every good boss, my section eventually would be traded and my bosses then weren't the best. I guess it isn't intuitive how to effectively lead engineers. Usually after we were traded to ineffective leaders, the entire section was farmed out and we were eliminated. I certainly don't miss my profession though I still love my craft and use it in my daily life.
ReplyDeleteEd, the transition from "good bosses" to "resource managers" has happened to me as well several times. They seem less interested in being a good boss and more interested in pushing their way up the perceived ladder; we become resources to be used in their upward climb, no more.
DeleteI daily come to anticipate the end of my formal working life more and more.
So many things about the corporate world drover me bonkers, and trying to come up with a politically correct, trendy word for "boss" is one of them. Personally, I like "manager." People Leader gives way too much credit to the ones who, as you say here, do not lead! A boss/manager can make one's life either pleasant or miserable. In my last job I had a fantastic manager for eight years. She gave me support and assistance when I needed it and always looked out for me. Consequently, I would have done anything for her. Then, with an upper management change, she got a package (as I would, two years later). After that I had SEVEN, that's right, SEVEN managers in two years. It was pure BS and even worse for the people who reported to me who, along with me, kept hearing that at some point we would start discussing "roles and responsibilities." When we finally had the conversation about my leaving, those roles and responsibilities had still never been defined. I had the occasion to see my eight-year boss a few weeks ago and got to tell her how much I appreciated her. I'm glad you got that opportunity too.
ReplyDeleteBob - A good manager (or boss) can make all the difference in the world.
DeleteI have not had that many bosses in such a short period. Absolutely sounds like a company in distress at that point.
I will say that having such fine bosses included the incentive for me to try to become a better boss; hopefully those under me have benefited from the example I have been given.
It's fortunate to have a good boss. And extra nice that you could have a social visit like that. Sounds like she retired to the perfect place.
ReplyDeleteLeigh, it was absolutely amazing -just enough property to be manageable and in a very quiet location. And lots of water, something I have come to appreciate very much.
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