This past weekend with my sister and The Outdoorsman in town, we made a stop at The Super Large Bookstore in town. The Outdoorsman found a bench immediately while my sister and I headed off into the aisles and piles.
I emerged some time later, empty handed. He looked at me quizzically. "Nothing that was on my list", I said, "and if it is not on the list, I am probably not buying it. I am literally out of space."
Later when they came back to the apartment and looked at my shelves, he nodded. "I see what you mean" he said.
---
One of the challenges that has come up as I continue along the path of Essentialism and finding "The Vital Few" is a realization of not only how much I have, but how little I need.
To be fair, I think with the exception of one or two items - probably socks and jeans - I have all the clothing I could possibly use until I die. I could (and should) re-read every book I own instead of purchasing another one. I have all the training weapons I will ever need. And except for the perishable item of bacteria, I have the cheesecloth and molds for almost every kind of cheese.
On and on it goes.
In some things I am trying to more carefully manage what "need" - books is one example. As mentioned above, there is a list of books. They are not available through the library (which is the first screen everything now goes through). They are books that I want to read and have a high chance of re-reading (the second screen everything now goes through). And so they exist on a Thriftbooks list, patiently waiting both to appear and to be evaluated before I press the "Buy now" button.
If there is a new "book" I want, it goes on the list. Because I am at the point of only buying from the list.
---
How does this tie into the idea of organizing my life and the Vital Few?
As the things I am leaning towards "going big" on continue to emerge, what also emerges is everything else that I am not "going big" on. Which leads to two questions:
1) For the Vital Few, what do I really need and do I have it? (For most of the items that are rising to the top of the list, I do.)
2) For the Trivial Many, I should obviously not be doubling down with more if it is something that I do not intend to follow - but the question then becomes "Why am I keeping what I am keeping"?
That second question becomes a very telling one. If I am consciously not going to follow up on things, why do I still keep them? One could argue it is the sunk cost fallacy; one could also argue that it is simply the dragon nature within me that insists I keep my hoard, no matter the fact that it brings me no value or joy beyond being mine.
---
An odd thing, this realignment of material values as I sort through the things I really should be focusing on.
Only one things seems certain: Not only should I have less things by the end of this, anyone hoping to make a living off of me by counting on me to purchase things will be sadly out of luck.
I don't got to bookstores often these days and many times, come out empty handed. As a reader of almost exclusively non-fiction, I have a hard time picking a book out solely by the title of it which is generally all I have to go on in the store. If a title grabs me, I pick up the book and see if there is something to be decerned about it by words on the cover or inside flaps and make a decision. More often than not, it goes back to the shelf. I do enjoy the search though.
ReplyDeleteBy far, most of my books are bought online through use of gift certificates given to me by family members in search of gift ideas. It works well because I can find a good book I've already read using their search engine and then allow them to suggest other similar books using their algorithm. I also find the generated reviews on the subject matter to be better than what is written on the cover or inside flap.
The only problem is that the amounts of gift certificates, generally add up to more reading material than I get through in a year including books borrowed and ones I occasionally reread, so I have a net accumulation of books that doesn't seem to be getting smaller. But I too am working on culling this down which is getting easier to do the older I get and the shorter my future becomes.
Ed - I have to admit that books now are either ones I really want or things that I go do online research about to see if they are worth the purchase or are highly recommended by authors that I read and trust.
DeleteVirtually 100% of my books are purchased online at this point as the place we went to last weekend is one of the two used bookstores, a frequent, the other being one in New Home 2.0 - Which is obviously much harder to get to at this point.
I think after this last list that I have, I may commit to just rereading books that I own for a year or two and see how that is. I certainly have enough.
That clothing realization hit a few years back although like you socks seem to be a needed replacement since I don't know how to darn holes in them. Another matter is reading the OAF Sarge's blog, too many books keep popping up there to tempt the credit card.......:)
ReplyDeleteNylon12 - I have to admit with the exception of the jeans and socks and underwear, any clothes I want or need to buy at this point Our purely vanity to please myself. Which is OK; I think there's always a little place to make ourselves happy just because and I do like buying vests now.
DeleteI do darn my socks, but it only extends their life a certain portion, not a great deal as I do not have the trick either.
Sarge's blog Is definitely a risk to anyone's bank account.
It's nice to get to a place where eternal buying is no longer seen as a way of life, where we can finally feel content with what we have and not feel the need for more. Freeing, actually.
ReplyDeleteLeigh - Interestingly, I think I already started to apply this in a small way two years ago during our trip to Greece. I was not interested in scads of small trinkets; I was interested in one single purchase of value (my icon). Likewise in Turkey last year, I/we made one purchase of value (our carpet). And this year in Cambodia and Vietnam, I made two - frivolous, one good (for a total cost of something like USD $40). And it is incredibly freeing.
DeleteNow to get to the next stage - being able to shed things more effectively.