Update: I went to see both my mother and my father today.
Seeing my mother has come to be a relatively easy task. She no longer asks about when she is going home. Speaking with my sister, she may have even made a friend with another woman who came in about the same time she did. She still does not seem to remember many activities (I know she is playing bingo), but she is doing them. When I came to see her today, she had just finished dinner and was having dessert (lemon cake with glaze icing). She tried to offer it to through the window screen - Thanks Mom, it looks good but I cannot have some right now. Soon.
My father was more difficult.
They had taken his wristbands off and the elbow pads too, which appeared to covered the scratches from his fall (they were rather alarming, even in their healing). The first thing he mentioned to me was the fact he did not have any money - in his words, he was "flat a$$ed broke" and could I bring him some? I pointed out that he did not really need money, but he was insistent that he did (fortunately, my sister was bringing him some clothes later. He had told her the same thing. She had five $1 bills in the bag of clothes and let the nurse know why they were in there and to make sure he got them).
His conversation is still very disjointed. I tried to get him to tell me about what he did today but because either he could not hear me over the phone or did not understand the question, I got no sense of of it. He started to tell me something which I thought might be related to what he did, but then it seemed to veer off as it did yesterday: he knew of whom and where he was speaking but I had no idea After about 20 minutes, the nurse came in with dinner. She looked as me as if to ask if I needed more time but I motioned her in. I told my father I loved him and to be sure he ate everything.
Physically, he looked a little bit stronger. Mentally and spiritually, he seems a long way from himself. It breaks me heart - as I tried to explain to someone, it is as if someone had broken his spirit in two. I wonder if - or when - he will recover it.
Request: So we have hit our first insurance issue.
The insurance company sent a letter to my sister saying that they would only cover 25%, not 100%, of my mother's stay. Why? Because the place she is staying does not have an RN on staff 24 hours a day.
This is more than a little frustrating because she had called - prior to committing to moving my mother in - and told them the location to find out if it was acceptable per the terms of the policy. They did not return the call, so my sister assumed it was approved and moved forward. Now this.
We can move my mother if we have to, but obviously it would be better if we did not. I think that doing this twice in a short period of time would be detrimental to her well being.
My sister received a phone message this evening. Apparently the matter has been submitted for a appeal. Not sure why.
So this is my request. It is a pretty specific one. If you are a praying person, could you specifically pray that a waiver is granted and my mother can stay where she is with 100% coverage? If you are good-thought-thinking person, could you do the same?
I seldom pray for very specific items but this one is kind of special. I will certainly relate what happens.
Post Script: I have been overwhelmed by the support I have received throughout this. People that post here, and in some cases people that have contacted me on the side (in both cases, people whose attention I never would think I merit). From the bottom of my heart, thank you.
People have asked me how I am managing all this with what seems like a relatively pleasant demeanor. God, I tell them. And writing. And the support I find here. Thank you.
Your Obedient Servant, Toirdhealbheach Beucail