If I think about the people and friends who I admire most in my life with what they are doing in their lives - some of theme that post here like Preppy and Kymber and others - like Miss Moonlight and Nighean Ruadh - that seem to have found their way into removing the non-essentials and leaving the essentials, thereby ensuring everything they do will be purposeful.
I need to become better at this.
I wasn't given much choice though. The great PC world out there seemed to prefer I disappear and embrace a more secluded homesteading life. I really wanted to be a lawyer :)
ReplyDeleteIf I had I like button I would use that Preppy. Myself, I was supposed to be an Inside Trader...
Deletethanks for that vote of confidence, my friend. but something that i learned a while ago, and it took a long time to learn (and i still re-learn it) is that there are things that we must do (kind of like you mention in your post below) like go to work or to a dentist appointment. we hate doing it, but we must. so i will do what i must do, as will jam (he's out there hand shoveling the driveway - the snowplow on the atv can't handle the amount of snow!). but whatever time i have that is mine - i relish in it. i do things i love. and i think that the things we love to do are the most-essential, most purposeful things in life.
ReplyDeletejam and i are incredibly fortunate to be retired, although he still does IT contract work, mostly from home. but that doesn't mean that we are laying around bored - no siree! we chose this lifestyle and it is not easy although when you read our blog it may sound like all we do is run around naked, suntan, go swimming and fishing. and we do those things because they are essential to our well-being. hottub dips and all. but we live very frugally, try to grow as much of our own food as possible, only go into the city when we absolutely have to, and only attend events in our 2 small communities. but that is the life that we want to live. so hours spent planting seeds, weeding, and preserving our harvests are not easy jobs. but they are the jobs that are essential to us feeling purpose-filled. and give our lives meaning.
it is not easy to learn what are the essentials, but like anything, practice makes perfect. perhaps you think you should be learning a new skill, so you spend time at that...but what if you don't really NEED to learn the new skill...and what if the time spent learning the new skill could be time for you to practice your throwing or re-reading your favourite books?
one last thing - i tried very hard to make a difference at every job i have ever had. it was at the last job that i was at for 7yrs, was very well-respected and very well paid that i realized - this is just a job. i was never actively trying to get promoted or anything - that was not the reason why i tried so hard. i tried because i thought it was important to do as much as i possibly could. if i had that time over, i would work every one of my jobs to the best of my ability but no more than that. a job pays for bills and allows us to support our children and families. but it is just that - a job. do your best at your work because for now it is essential...but don't make your life be about your work. enjoy your work but don't kill yourself over your work. and figure out what you really want to do with the hours that you aren't at work.
i know this is rambling but i hope that it makes some sense. much love to you and your beautiful family! your friend,
kymber
HA! After seeing the lovely pictures outside your window, the thought of you folks running around naked and sunbathing makes me laugh...
DeleteI know you do live frugal and hardworking lives, as does anyone who has tried to do anything like that. Learning the essentials is a life-long work, I think. It's the letting go of the things that came into your life during that time that are difficult.
I am trying to change how I view my job - work hard when I am there, be sure to take walks, make others' lives a little easier, get less involved in the politics and rush of trying to get "the new most important thing ever" done. There is still a gap there though, a gap of wanting to do something that matters.
And you never, ever ramble. I treasure all of your posts and writing and advice.
Lhiats, TB
TB - i oftentimes don't read my comments before i post them on various blogs. blogs like yours where the comment isn't published immediately make me shiver in fear...because i didn't re-read or edit my comment and i can't until it is approved - arghghghgh! what if i said something wrong? what if i didn't say it right? arghghghgh! i just re-read my rambling comment to you and i hope that you know what i meant. sometimes i find i can come off as preachy and that is never my intent. othertimes on various blogs it seems like i somehow know all the answers and that all anyone has to do is move to cape breton and learn to hunt and sunbathe - arghghghgh. i do truly believe that the people who really "get me" like Pioneer P and you and a whole pile of others - they overlook my enthusiasm for trying to help and forgive when it sounds like i am Old Mother Hubbard or something.
ReplyDeletei truly think that you understand that my motivation in sharing anything or offering advice is because i care.
and i really do.
your friend,
kymber
Sweet Miss Kymber - You never come off as preachy. You are very enthusiastic and want everyone to share in the same joie de vivre that you have. You may not have all the answers but you are much farther down the road to doing something compared to many.
DeleteHave no fear - your advice and insights are incredibly welcome here. And you are surely not the only one who can be accused of rambling on this blog (I look no farther than myself in this regard).
Lhiats, TB
Also, I shared your site with my friend An Nighean Ruadh. She said your food porn (e.g. pictures of your meals) is great.
DeleteLhiats, TB
TB - thank you for understanding. i do really try to help. and i guess you and i should both join ramblers anonymous - bahahahah! does your friend have a blog? if so, let me know here and i will check it out. please thank your friend on my behalf. i am no great chef or anything, i just like to make our ordinary little meals a little pretty. thank you! xox
ReplyDeleteShe does not. I wish she did. I will certainly let her know. And keep on rambling and making beautiful food.
ReplyDeleteLhiats, TB