20 October 20XX+1
My Dear Lucilius:
Winter continues its landing approach: the temperatures are definitely trending in a single direction with nights starting to become such that one does not want to linger out in the evening. The days continue their run towards night as well, shaving off small splinters of useful daylight with every passing sunset.
I have not written since the fire as there has been little enough to write about. True, I have perhaps been a bit more reclusive than my usual self, leaving for foraging rather early and being home earlier than I would usually be, so the likelihood of seeing anyone has diminished even below its usual odds. But I have sincerely made an effort to stay here on my own small piece of property.
While nothing has happened, there is no sense in pushing things to where they might happen.
The last few days would be rather unremarkable until a rather strange thing happened: a bag of coffee showed up on my doorstep. The next day, a ziploc bag of jerky. This morning, three pieces of seasoned firewood.
The coffee was some brand I had never heard of: “Strong like the Mountains” ran the logo on the advertising for a tourist town far North of here. The jerky was very clearly homemade, firewood of a quality I have not seen or burned in over a year.
I asked Young Xerxes about them; he professed to know nothing but said he would “look into it”. I have become acquainted with him well enough now to fully expect he will not look into it.
I also fully expect he knows where these gifts came from.
It is hard to accept such things, given the situation that we find ourselves in and that these represent real sacrifice on the part of their givers. The jerky can be remade of course and perhaps the firewood could be re-seasoned (you should see these logs, Lucilius; I will try and save them for Yule logs). The coffee is effectively irreplaceable.
But as my mother always reminded me, to not accept a gift or accept it with poor grace is to denigrate both the giver and the intention behind it.
Perhaps even I have been made a bit cynical by the world we now live in.
Your Obedient Servant, Seneca
A person who gives others gifts even when times are very difficult is a true friend. And the mother cited above (gift gving) was a wise person.
ReplyDeleteAnon - I forget where I heard or read that piece of advice, but it was from a real person. I have always tried to bear it in mind, especially the part about receiving gifts and assistance graciously. Truly, we deny others the joy and privilege of doing good when we do.
DeleteI agree - the joy of watching a gift receiver getting exactly what they wanted is satisfying to the gift giver. The appreciation is witnessed which gives pleasure to the giver.
DeleteMost curious TB, someone regards Seneca highly.
ReplyDeleteNylon12, I have often found those that may not give vocal or visible support may provide support in quiet ways.
DeleteThe hardest gift I ever had to accept was sitting at dinner in South America and I was given the dinner meal.
ReplyDeleteI was quite aware that was all they had to eat. They were going to watch me eat and they go to bed hungry.
I cheated, I opened my Bible and read the bread and fishes story to them and we all went to bed a little hungry.
It hurt the gardens we helped plant with them would be only work for a couple of months before they can harvest some food.
My mission team chose to go a little hungry until we could get more supplies into the village.
Michael the anonymous
That is a great story and example Michael. Thanks for sharing.
DeleteHave you ever seen that meme of an old couple walking?
DeleteIt says, "Old people need so little, but they need it so much".
Same with folks on the edge.
I have not seen the meme, but the sentiment resonates.
DeleteTrue that. Before my Mom passed away and she was lingering towards the end, it gave all of us an opportunity to talk. I asked her what she missed the most about living with her condition. She thought about a bit, then said what she missed the most was her cooking for herself. She was widowed for 24 years so had a lot of time to cook.
DeleteShe appreciated the others who brought and cooked food for her, but through the years, we each tweak the recipe to our preferences. That was what she missed - simple but it meant so much to her.
How interesting, Anon. Thank you for sharing. I can see where one would miss the tweaks of doing things the way one had always done it - as I reflect on it, it would certainly be true for me as well.
Delete"Someone", understands and appreciates Seneca's wisdom, compassion and "payment" for reconciliation. He was knowingly, willing to take on this, unasked for burden. "Someone" wants to lessen the burden. Maybe multiple someones.
ReplyDeleteT_M, even in my own (much less) eventful life, support comes ftom unexpected quarters.
DeleteI have gotten a lot better about receiving gifts with grace as I have grown older. When I was younger, I felt like it showed that I was needy in some way. Now, older and wiser, I know how I feel giving gifts to others and assume my gift giver feels the same way.
ReplyDeleteYeah, that took this retard awhile to figure out. I learn (usually) eventually.
DeleteEd, myself as well. It has also made me more thoughtful in the gifts I give, as I want to give something that is useful and will not necessarily not ever be used or simply given away at some point.
DeleteI think that the gifts were anonymous says a lot. Sometimes "gifts" seem to come with strings, as in a return favor expected. Seneca's gifts express a genuine appreciation for him as a person. That's the best gift of all.
ReplyDeleteLeigh, the anonymous gift is one of the highest things I can think of that one person can give another - not only for an expression of love or appreciation or respect, but that they are willing to forego any recognition from the giving of the gift. While I did make the point that by refusing a gift we can be denying a person the privilege of doing good, there are many examples of people giving gifts because they want the public applause of doing so.
Delete