My continuing job transition saga:
A Sort of Hammerfall
A Sort of Hammerfall: Update I
A Sort of Hammerfall: Update II
1) Working in a position that you will not inhabit in a relatively short period of time is a very surreal experience. It is sort of the same as having a terminal disease: You know about it. Your coworkers know about it. Your management knows about it. Yet everyone carefully does not mention it in public and continues to act as though everything is as normal. It is truly an elephant in the room situation. To be frank, it makes me uncomfortable.
2) This week I was asked to work on a transition plan. I received a couple of tools from our HR department to manage this, but realized that I need to take one step back and list out everything that I do. It has at least 15 projects on it. From each of these, I need to make a more complete presentation of what it is, what is outstanding, who is involved, and when it is going to be transferred.
(Two appendices on this: The first is that I work best with the written word, not so well with planning tools and spreadsheets. This is a fundamental difference between myself and others in my company. I cannot think effectively in planning software.
The second is that there is a reason I am feeling overwhelmed. It is because I am.)
3) This past week we cut over to our essential personnel only working at the site. As I can work from home, I am doing so. What it has made me realize - with the aspects of interaction cut off - is that I have truly reached a point where I am not engaged. I want to do a good job because that is what I do, but I am no longer enthusiastic the way I was two years ago, or even a year ago. The feeling of overwhelmed has translated into a feeling of "I am finding hard to care". This was problem that was noted in December and following as we have gone through the work of employees that left the company: it is pretty clear that at some point, they just gave up.
I cannot give up. But I need to do everything I can to push on my end to make this transition smooth and quick. Turns out I am truly ready.
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