Death is much in my mind this day.
I have two people in my larger circle that are both dying or have died within the last week: one an acquaintance from college I have not seen is 26 years (and would not have known about except for social media), the other one a coworker with whom I am somewhat acquainted with at work. Both dying of cancer.
It is moments like these that tend to snap one back from the world that we all dwell in, the day to day matters which we get caught up with. The minor power struggles, the tiny empires we build, the annoyances which attain monumental proportions in our mind. Almost everything which, for me at least, my day seems to get caught up in.
I have read the writings of those who are dying, both at least on of the people listed above as well as friend I met through the Highland Games that I only knew after cancer had destroyed his palate and he could not talk. Perhaps not unstrangely, their writings and meditations become largely free of the things we tether our lives to and become about mediations on life, their condition, or their loved ones.
That is about it.
How do I get that perspective now, while I live? How do I let go of the things temporal and fix them on the things eternal? Could it be as simple as mediation on life (God for me) and my loved ones (assuming condition should not be covered right now)?
Or is it simply asking the question, every time something comes up, "Is this something that will matter when I am dying?" and making the next move based on that?
This is hard to do. I've heard old folks say "Don't worry about it." It's easy for them to say; they're no longer "in the game." The kids are grown. The job is a memory. What they have is what they have. The dying are the same way. If you don't have to prepare for the eventuality of tomorrow, there's almost nothing to worry about at all. The rest of us have to strike that difficult-to-find balance. True; tomorrow may never come. Odds are though, if you're in passable shape, and you're not standing on the deck of the Titanic, tomorrow will most likely manifest itself, and we need to be ready for it. Good luck finding that balance...
ReplyDeleteI guess what I was trying to get at Pete was more of a state of mind. I am constantly consumed by petty things of work and life which I allow to get in the way of the things that actually do matter. It is a change of that perspective that I am trying for.
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