Extroverted Invtrovert

On the way to something else yesterday I suddenly discovered that I am an extroverted introvert.

I actually realized that I like people.  I like interacting with them.  I like (heaven forfend) talking to them. Not all the time of course.  And not unconditionally.  But a great deal more than what I thought I did.

I have always considered myself an introvert.  But lately what has popped up a couple of times is that introversion is not so much preferring the absence of people as it is how you recharge.  Extroverts can charge up in atmospheres with people, introverts need quiet time away to do so.

The quiet time away for recharging has not changed for me - there are weekends where after a typical week all I want to do is crawl into a hole and read.  But recharging, as I have to make myself realize, is more of how we regain energy, not how that energy is spent.  It is like a cell phone:  the energy for it  can be used quickly or slowly but it is still used.  The phone still has to be plugged in somewhere.

What does this realization mean?  It means that I can actually concede that I like spending time with people - and it is okay to mention that to myself.  It means that I can give myself permission to seek out others to spend time with.  And it certainly means that I can (and need) to work on honing up my conversational and relational abilities to be better at making and carrying conversations.

If I realize this, I am excited to come to grips with what it actually means as move on with this knowledge.  Not that it really changes anything - but it would seem that everything changes.