23 September 20XX+1
My Dear Lucilius:
One of the habits I have maintained throughout the past year, as senseless as it now seems, is carrying a wallet.
It is something that, upon thinking about it, has been a habit for time out of mind: for years, just before I left the house, I would pull out my wallet from its storage location and place it in my back pocket (and my keys in the front). Even when the smartphone crazed emerged and people started carrying their minimal wallets on the back of their phones, I persevered carrying my wallet – not only because of the fact that the entire “all your cards on the back of a phone” seemed like an accident waiting to happen, but because being anywhere without a wallet in my left back pocket when I was out of the house simply felt wrong.
I had not even paid attention to it until this very morning when, getting ready to go outside and work, I instinctively reached out and started to put in in my back pocket. I paused, sat down, and pulled it out.
What is inside the wallet now? A collection of things that even a year ago would not have seemed unusual: A driver’s license for a state that may or may not exist. A bank and credit card that will not function without electricity and data. A card for a warehouse store that likely it not open nor can a I get to. That plethora of smaller cards that inevitably seems to build up over time: insurance cards, roadside assistance cards, the occasional membership card. A smattering of change that I carry as habit from years ago when one of my children was always asking for the commemorative pennies (two quarters and a penny per souvenir generation). A half dollar piece I carry for luck as they were so rarely received anymore.
In the billfold? A smattering of bills that only hold value as a fire-starter now. And various fortunes from Chinese fortune cookies that meant something to me over the years.
I remember getting my father and grandfather’s wallets when they had passed. Theirs, too, had the same collection of official documents, random items, and small bills in them – along with photographs, which was the fashion once upon a time (but feel out fashion even during my years). I have them tucked away somewhere here, small artifacts of them and their daily lives as they, too, carried one every day.
Could I go out now without the wallet? Of course I could and my life would be no different: it is not as if I am likely to get pulled over at this point and need a license or need to present a card for anything or even be held up for the contents of my wallet.
And yet, to not carry it would seem unnatural.
Call me a sentimental fool Lucilius, a man who remains slightly out of time from the world that he lives in, if in a different way that before. But in my mind and beyond just the physical presence, a wallet remains a constant reminder of a world that seems gone, even if only for a little while. And in keeping that wallet, perhaps on a more personal level than some other things, it feels as if I am keeping that memory alive, along with the memories of those that have gone before and in turn, carried their wallets.
Although, I suppose, the joy at my age of being asked for my ID to purchase an alcoholic drink will never come again.
Your Obedient Servant, Seneca
An interesting musing as I watch the steam off my coffee.
ReplyDeleteSeneca always surprises me. I sit down to write and so often am surprised at what he chooses to talk about - sometimes it mirrors things in my life, but sometimes he is in a completely different place.
DeleteYah, the shift of a wallet being needed is being superseded by tapping that smartphone to pay for items at the store...yet if the electricity goes away then.......Some habits do indeed die hard.....:)
ReplyDeleteNylon12, I have one of my credit cards linked to my phone because there are certain advantages here, but I am never very comfortable with the idea.
DeleteWe have become so dependent on power, we should be doing everything in our power (pun intended) to expand it, not reduce it.
That statement is why I went to all cash.
DeleteI have recently started making sure I carry at least some cash with me now. I do it all the time when I travel, as you can never be sure that everywhere will take a credit card.
DeleteLike Senaca, leaving my wallet at home would be very unnatural to do. Akin to leaving the house without my pants, lol. Being one of those 'trucker's' chained wallets, a lot of bulk could be removed. But a rechargeable flashlight is on the chain as well as a small multi-tool carried in the wallet's zippered pouch. I use it at least three times a week in the office and the number of people asking for an eyeglass screwdriver also allows me to help.
ReplyDeleteAnon - I have started carrying a Leatherman tool on my belt (I carried a Swiss Army knife for years, but my pockets were getting packed) for the very same reason.
DeleteThis post was undoubtedly prompted by me going through my wallet this week, which I do from time to time to see if there is anything I can remove.
I'm not wishing for an apocalypse, but the thing I would probably look forward to the most should one arrive is not having to carry a wallet around and perhaps the slowing down of our family lives and becoming more family centric.
ReplyDeleteEd, I suspect even if the world did end, like Seneca I would continue to carry my wallet out of a combination of habit and sheer stubbornness.
DeleteLike you, I can see the benefit in the slowing down of life and refocusing on relationships. If I am honest about it, I think our desire to be entertained and our addiction to media (I can use no other word) have added greatly to this issue.
Maybe it's one of those things that helps keep his world with a semblance of normal. Habit, for sure, but also a lifeline to the memory of the time before.
ReplyDeleteLeigh, I suspect there is something of that as well. My father, even after his first stroke, insisted on having some cash in his wallet. He clearly was not going anywhere, but it made him feel ready in case it happened.
DeleteMy wife will ask "do you have your knife?" My standard answer "I've got my pants on don't I?" It is a rare day when I leave the house without a pocket knife
ReplyDeleteAnon - As mentioned above, I stopped carrying a knife after my pockets got a bit full. I only recently started carrying my Leatherman tool - nice because it can be on my belt (instead of my pocket), but it does not have everything that a well equipped Swiss army knife does. I may need to up my game.
Delete