Last Friday I nearly broke at work.
It was the on the tail end of what has been a rather long and hectic two month lead in to two graduations, one that has put a rather lot of strain on the energy and time of our family (I underestimated this. Hopefully, they will be smoother from here on out). A project, which I though I was done with, was not done at all. We still had one graduation to go.
Needless to say, I am seriously begin to question a lot of things.
As part of this questioning exercise, I began to make a list as part of my Essentialism Exercise. I listed activities that I have been interested in that I currently own something for, interests which seem to support those activities, and actions (which are the ways I spend my time, socially and employment). The list for activities will probably be close to 30 by the time I am done calculating; interests were around 10 and actions were a small 4.5,
Yes, in case you are counting. That is a rather large amount of things to be interested in and doing, especially when almost 30% of a week is consumed by work and another 35-40% by the simple acts of living. So yes, I do have a problem and I need to resolve it.
But how? That is always the struggle. I can state that I will not continue to invest in activities, but in point of fact for all of my activities, the sunk costs are already in place. It is not as stopping them will change the amount of money or time I have already invested in them. And to "stop" something somehow feels like I am surrendering on something.
Interestingly, nothing remotely related to my career field is on the list. Which is telling to me, although I have no idea what to do with that particular sliver of information. As you can probably imagine, none of my activities are such that they would generate any income at all, let alone an income sufficient to even remotely replace the one I am making now.
I tried to split the difference today, going through my closet and doing another sweep of clothes I no longer need (how many Highland Throwing Event T-shirts can one own!) and papers that I have preserved over time for no particular good reason at this point. It felt good to make that much progress - but in the back of my mind I understand this is really only a time filler at this point. Serious surgery needs to be done if I want to actually make significant progress.
And, if last week is any indication of the rest of the year to come, I need to get my house into order rather soon.