Well, as an introvert of course I think that is the case (!), but I do believe it is true because introverts, having less friends, tend to be more loyal to the friends they have.
Used to believe that too, Kelly. But these past few years disproved it to me, at least as far as liberal introverts go. Before Trump they appreciated my attention, post Trump they started to hate me, and once the face diaper nonsense started, they utterly despised me for not going along with their new religion.
Anonymous - to be fair, I think it is simply the other side of the coin. Introverts can be extremely loyal friends until they feel like they have been betrayed (And it is not just politics, it can be any sort of relational, social, or interpersonal issue). At that point, it is exactly as you say. But I have lived through any number of these inflection points through my life and even as an introvert, have lost friends.
One important point - for me at least - to consider is that it does bring up the question of friendship versus belief: Do I choose to value the friendship over whatever this potential rupture could be? These days, my answer is almost always "the friendship", which means that there are things I do not talk about or subjects I simply let pass as I value the relationship more than those issues. But I think an argument could certainly be made the other way.
Thank you for the extremely thoughtful response to my reply to Kelly, Toirdhealbheach. You've given me something to think about. In the meantime, I spend increasing amounts of time alone.
Anonymous - First and sincerely, thank you so much for responding. My intent was not to sound rude (I hope it did not).
I am not going to at all deny what you feel - I honestly feel the same in many cases. There are so many things that I cannot discuss with a variety of people now because of the subject involved. In some cases, even though I do not explicitly discuss such things, people have drifted away or I have drifted away from them - in my case, my drifting is due to the fact that I will do almost anything to avoid conflict. Drifting away might be made right later; conflict almost never seems to.
One thing I try for - and my readers have been very kind in helping - is building, in at least some fashion, a sort of group where we discuss such things like this in a respectful and kind manner and hopefully build a small sense of community where it might not otherwise exist.
Comments are welcome (and necessary, for good conversation). If you could take the time to be kind and not practice profanity, it would be appreciated. Thanks for posting!
Or, as in my case, married them
ReplyDeleteFair. Also true for me, along with the adoption by one or more extroverts.
DeleteI could be wrong, but I believe when one befriends an introvert, they'll never find a more sincere, loyal friend.
ReplyDeleteWell, as an introvert of course I think that is the case (!), but I do believe it is true because introverts, having less friends, tend to be more loyal to the friends they have.
DeleteUsed to believe that too, Kelly. But these past few years disproved it to me, at least as far as liberal introverts go. Before Trump they appreciated my attention, post Trump they started to hate me, and once the face diaper nonsense started, they utterly despised me for not going along with their new religion.
DeleteDefinitely the case m'thinks
DeleteAnonymous - to be fair, I think it is simply the other side of the coin. Introverts can be extremely loyal friends until they feel like they have been betrayed (And it is not just politics, it can be any sort of relational, social, or interpersonal issue). At that point, it is exactly as you say. But I have lived through any number of these inflection points through my life and even as an introvert, have lost friends.
DeleteOne important point - for me at least - to consider is that it does bring up the question of friendship versus belief: Do I choose to value the friendship over whatever this potential rupture could be? These days, my answer is almost always "the friendship", which means that there are things I do not talk about or subjects I simply let pass as I value the relationship more than those issues. But I think an argument could certainly be made the other way.
John, I think for both of us it is true, right?
DeleteThank you for the extremely thoughtful response to my reply to Kelly, Toirdhealbheach. You've given me something to think about. In the meantime, I spend increasing amounts of time alone.
DeleteAnonymous - First and sincerely, thank you so much for responding. My intent was not to sound rude (I hope it did not).
DeleteI am not going to at all deny what you feel - I honestly feel the same in many cases. There are so many things that I cannot discuss with a variety of people now because of the subject involved. In some cases, even though I do not explicitly discuss such things, people have drifted away or I have drifted away from them - in my case, my drifting is due to the fact that I will do almost anything to avoid conflict. Drifting away might be made right later; conflict almost never seems to.
One thing I try for - and my readers have been very kind in helping - is building, in at least some fashion, a sort of group where we discuss such things like this in a respectful and kind manner and hopefully build a small sense of community where it might not otherwise exist.
Thank you for stopping by.
I think The Mrs. might appreciate that one . . .
ReplyDeleteExcelsior! The rarefied air of The Mrs.' approval. You have made my day, sir!
Delete