Heroes Without Capes

Building from yesterday, are parents considered heroes?
Parents hold an unusual location in 21st Century American society.  On the one hand they continue to be the primary caregivers for their children; on the other hand they sometimes spend the least amount of time with their children every day.

Least amount of time?  Total up the time a child is in school, with an activity - let alone friends - and suddenly the relationship with their parents comes to resemble the relationships that many adults such as myself know all too well, the relationship of work.  You know it, or have in the past:  where you spend more time with work associates than those of your family, constructed relationships instead of created ones.

True, this is the way of society in these days.  At the same time, the role of parent gets pushed out.  They become less and less role models and guides and more and more providers - providers of housing, of food and clothing, of transportation to other places.  In one sense parenting is reduced to a series of service industries.

Here's the rub:  service providers are scarcely seen by anyone as heroes.

Who become their heroes?  Those who do what they want to do, those who espouse important beliefs, those who entertain, occasionally even those that do.  Funny thing about that though - many many heroes in 21st Century America are heroes based on what they do in a controlled set of circumstances, not in the grind of daily living.

Think a minute:  pick a hero of your child.  If that person did you what you did - woke them up, got food in them, dropped them of at school, picked them up from school and ferried them to practice, brought them home, fed them, reminded them of their homework and put them to bed - would that person also be a hero?

Of course not.  Heroes call us out to be braver than we are, to be better than we are, to do more than we are.  Heroes are not the common stuff of living.

Do we have a skewed view of heroes?  Of course we do.  We value that which is fleeting and worthless and devalue that which is important.  I'm not arguing the point - but in order to change it, we need to accept that we are starting at point A and move forward.

Do we as parents, friends, relations - do we seek to build up the role parents in the lives of children we know?  Do we point out to them not only the stuff that makes a hero, but that the very people that sacrifice so much for them are just as much heroes as anyone else they can admire? 

Should we encourage our children to have heroes?  Of course we should.  There are many great hearted and noble people throughout history that we can learn from, we can emulate.  But in our haste to emulate them, we need to remind our children that more than likely, some of the greatest heroes they will ever meet are living in their house with them right now, silently working away for their benefit.

Not every hero wears a cape and a mask.