Learning to Serve

Learning to be a servant is one of the most difficult things I have ever undertaken. 

To learn to be a servant is to realize the multiplicity of things that have to go on before and after something occurs - and realize that you are the one to do them.  To be a servant is to accept that even in the context of equals, someone asking for something means that you will do it - even if that results in the realization of others that you are not an equal.  To be a servant is to do without expectation (at least here) of reward or even acknowledgement.   To be a servant is to accept that sometimes, perhaps often, the great tasks of the enterprise or of the age are not yours to do and decide, to be replaced by the humble and unnoticed that may never been seen but are critically necessary.

This can be a very hard thing.

It's hard for me because I guess I have always believed that I was intended for something more:  to be a leader, a decision maker, someone who is out in front blazing a trail.  It's a thought our culture and society tends to enforce; whole books and websites are dedicated to the concept of being in charge.  I tried that once, working for The Firm.  On the one hand it was incredibly hypnotic, this sense of being at the apex of the pyramid, of striding across the landscape of business casting a shadow, of being the one to ask others to do.

Unfortunately, thing didn't work out as I had hoped.  Feelings of power and influence alone do not compensate for the quiet, hard work necessary to make things go.  And having a group of leaders who all believe (perhaps secretly) that the other person is the servant does not make for getting things done.

To be a servant is hard because you realize - in full-force frontal impact - how little control you have over so very many things.  To be a servant is ultimately to put your trust in the person or thing you are serving, that while you are performing your actions they are performing theirs in such a way that it ultimately benefits you as well as them.

Which is probably another reason why being a servant is so hard for so many:  they've been burned by serving those that are not worthy.

Think of world history:  those who gladly served National Socialism or Stalin's communism in hopes of  a better world only to see the long term ruin they caused.  Or more personally in our own lives, those who we have served - business supervisors, friends, even perhaps family - only to discover that they did not have our best interests at heart:  the layoffs that came after we excelled, the sudden cutoff of ties.  To be a servant is - willingly or unwillingly - to put your ultimate success and reward in the hands of someone else.

That's why, perhaps, Christians are uniquely positioned to be servants:  because ultimately we can have faith in the One on whose behalf we serve, that He will ultimately work everything to our good, that by serving Him and in His name He is truly looking out for our best interests, even if we ourselves cannot quite see that here.  Ultimately for the Christian there is ultimate success and reward because it is the hands of Another - One far greater than any of us and far more able to guarantee the results.

Ultimately serving is an act of faith.  Where is your faith placed?