Monday, November 28, 2016

A Change of Goals?

An epiphany of sorts this weekend.

This week has been a little rougher than I anticipated for a short work week.  I am taking the completion of the my last book - and authorship in general - harder than I expected.  I am restless.  I am bored.

I look to my "goals" for next year and frankly, they do not excite me at all.  I realized that even if I accomplish every one of them,  my life will be in the same place this year as I was last year.  This was not really what I was hoping for.

Why?   The do not guarantee success, or even making progress.  They have become boxes to be checked upon completion.

Which, I realized, is why I liked things like Role Playing Games and school.  The goal is clear:  do this, do that, get reward.  Output equals input.  Life, however, seems to lack that kind of clarity and linearity.

My goals have fallen into two categories:  ones that I accomplish and lead to nothing other than accomplishing them and one that I do not accomplish because I do not control the circumstances to make them happen.

I cannot make myself a best selling author or church elder or vintner (yes, these were all thoughts once upon a time) or even financially stable.  I can run obstacle races or compete in Highland Games or make cheese - but those are one time events that do not seem to translate into my life getting better.

So how do I find goals that are mostly in my control and not just one time events?  This has become the question of the hour - or at least the question of December.

I need to find something or things that will move me forward (to something - but what?) and have milestones that I can see and shoot for, places where the inputs mean output.  The other option:  working where "promotions" happen randomly or finances matter except when they do not or writing into a void that swallows the words on the wind  things where all the effort in the world can very well lead to nowhere.

How and where do I find worthy and achievable goals, the sorts of goals that will actually move me forward?

2 comments:

LindaG said...

Hard questions for sure. I wish I had an answer for you.
Good luck. Have a blessed week.

Toirdhealbheach Beucail said...

There are days I wish I had the kind of clarity I think I need. This weekend was one of those times.