Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Nagging Feeling

I'm struggling with that small nagging voice again.

It happened yesterday as I spoke to someone about another opportunity. The conversation was fine, the individual nice, the opportunity real - but as I walked away, I was unsettled by that small still sense of...something.

I don't really know what to make of that. They seem to be coming more and more in the last two weeks or so - this sense of going in a direction that I should not be, of being somewhat dislocated in my life even as I try to make my way forward.

There is a definite sense of not being happy in my employment - but there is not a sense of being led to be anywhere else right now. It's almost as if I feel like a fraud every time I talk to someone about an opportunity, but at the same time knowing that I need to find another opportunity.

And then the fear comes up - the lack of faith, the sense of "If I don't do something I'll be stuck here forever, unhappy and angry."

How do I resolve the counterforces of wanting to go yet not feeling led to?

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