Today is a milestone of sorts: the oldest, Nighean Gheal, will return home from abroad with a college degree and a brief stay before disappearing off to a summer internship (and quite possibly, no more than visits for returns; the youngest, Nighean Dhonn, will take her driver's test.
This happens, of course - as I told someone once who asked if I was sad about Nighean Gheal leaving for school, a little but not a lot: after all, we try and raise them to be independent. We should not be surprised that they then go do so.
It is the beginning of a slow avalanche of course, a sliding off of life's glacier that I can see coming even as there is little enough that can be done about it. Another two years and Nighean Bhean will graduate from college and Nighean Dhonn from high school (we large anticipate that once gone, there will be no looking back). Realistically, within two years there will just be two of us here on a regular basis.
There is nothing much for it, of course: Life moves along at its own pace and we cannot do anything to hinder its passing, only attempt to put puny roadblocks in its way to deny the reality of its coming, vain attempts to freeze Time as if such a thing were actually possible. Nor do I particularly face this particular issue with dread: in some real ways, parenting is an incredibly draining job and there is a point at which a slight break - hopefully for grandchildren, but one never knows anymore - would be more than welcome.
I am trying to plan for the eventuality now, rather than getting caught at the end with very little planned or thought of. More realistic to be prepared than surprised.
We will meet Nighean Gheal at the airport with signs and fanfare, and go out to celebrate twin accomplishments. If I feel a little fey about the whole thing, it is likely only to be the wind and the rain, nothing more.
Good to hear about the niglets TB! You two must be so proud! 👍
ReplyDeleteAnd you are right to get out of the way. Gawd... our in laws were in our family like a dirty shirt, and lord, they stirred up so much trouble and resentments, and things got so divisive and adversarial... there’s boundaries in families, they’re there for a reason, and you are wise to observe them.
We are proud, Glen. Fortunately, I had a pretty good example from my parents as well - they stepped back at the right time as well.
DeleteAlso Glen - because you have now made me look - the plural of “nighean” is “nigheannan”. Never had to ask myself that before.
DeleteThat’s what friends do, TB.
DeleteExpand the intellect!😂👍
I am glad the nigheannan are doing well.
Congratulations on your daughter's achievement. It is hard to watch them 'test their wings' and move out, but it is inevitable. They can't stay young forever.
ReplyDeleteThe years went fast, didn't they ?
Thank you! It is somewhat hard, but better they do it now while we still have input before they are out completely.
DeleteAnd yes, much more quickly than one anticipates.
I am reminded of the day I flew the home nest. I was so excited until my mom burst into tears as she hugged me goodbye. I bawled all the way over to my neighbor/college roommates house where we were to meet and convoy up to college that first day. He was a year older so there would be no tears there so I furiously tried to dry my eyes before arriving. Fortunately nobody noticed or said anything.
ReplyDeleteI hope I can contain the dry eyes when my oldest leaves here shortly. In theory, I'm prepared for that break as you describe but I don't know what reality will bring.
Ed, when you burst in to tears, tell them you are so proud of them you can't contain yourself. We all know that isn't the whole story, but it keeps the youngin' from worrying too much.
DeleteThe "proud of" thing is a good call, Judy. I think since none of our children read our blogs, it is a safe theory.
DeleteEd, I do not know that I became exceptionally sad at moving away for college. It only hit me afterwards, when I was there.
So much I could say but I’ll be brief. First, congratulations on the milestones. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI’m some years ahead of you — three, with seven years between first and last, boy-girl-boy, now 35, 32 and 28. First and middle are happily married, each with a son and daughter. The last one is about to be engaged. My heart is full.
I’ve wept buckets over the various life events and believe me, whether they’re under your roof or not, the parenting thing is a lifetime appointment. Their mother and I still fret and worry, more than we should, but we can’t help ourselves. But there is a sweetness to life for which I thank God regularly, and seeing them become adults has been one of His greatest gifts.
Bob - Thank you very much.
DeleteThe Ravishing Mrs. TB tends to fret a bit more than I do - but, as she is their mother, I suppose that is the way it normally goes. One hopes that I can continue to offer advice as needed.
Congratulations on your family and their success. Yes, our children earn theirs, but it is always on the basis of a solid foundation.
They grow up so fast. sigh
ReplyDeleteThey do Leigh, they do. Slow and quickly at the same time.
DeleteCongratulations and God bless. ♥
ReplyDeleteThank you very much Linda!
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