Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Waiting for A Life Change

So the hoped for life change has not appeared yet.
I am a lot more philosophical about this that I have been in the past.  Before, I would have been constantly fluttering from e-mail to phone, looking for a sign, an update, anything that would indicate that something was about to change.  If I was really agitated, I would go and check the Internet to see if anything had changed.

I would start my calculations, trying to come up with everything that I did not have to do if I started on a certain date.  I would dream (yes, I dream about work I do not have to do) about the sense of relief that would flood my life when the change occurred.

But, the change has not materialized yet.

And so, I go in about my day.  Have I checked once or twice?  Sure.  Did I send a follow up communication? Yes, but it has been a while sense I checked in.  Other than that, I just go about my day doing my thing.

Where does this philosophical bent come from, you might ask.  Surely it cannot  be because everything in your life has gone extremely pleasantly (it has not changed) or that you have a list of other opportunities should this one evaporate (I do not).    It has come, simply enough, from the concept - brought back to my attention last week - that ultimately it is God who changes and promotes.

I can do what I consider to be my best at anything:  twist, shout, polish myself to a brilliant sheen, say everything with a golden tongue. I can work my behind off, bend over backwards to make things happen, and sacrifice valuable time from other parts of my life.  And nothing will necessarily happen.

If I am brutally honest about it, almost every major thing in my life has happened in God's timing - and,  I might add, without the extreme amount of agitation I can put myself through.  The only time it did not was an error of my own choice (The Firm - perhaps right choice, but very wrong timing).  Everything else has simply moved through the system to conclusion.

There is my part to play of course - yes, I have to be diligent and work hard and keep my nose to the grindstone.  But the constant posturing and posing to move something ahead is something I simply need not do - when the time is right, God will act.

And so I patiently live my life, trying to improve things where possible and be better.  And wait, because at the point I least expect, the call to change will come.

No comments: