Wednesday, June 01, 2016

Could Be, Who Knows

As I sit here and write at 2300 hours on Tuesday night, I am exhausted.  We finished Embu tonight, a public demonstration of Iai.  This is the end of the third day of the Tokai, the end of 14 hours of training.  My calves are sore and my right knee is starting to say unkind things to me.  By all rights, I should be asleep already.

And yet, my mind is racing and sleep seems to be the farthest thing from my mind.

I feel a great current moving underneath my life, as if things are shifting around me in ways I cannot see or understand.  It is that sense that an ending of something is approaching and the beginning of something else is at hand.

I cannot define this thing completely.  I cannot say what the nature of the changes are.  I can sense hints, like something moving in murky water which only the currents of the water speak to something being there.

I know that changes are occurring at work and maybe that is part of the feeling.  I know that being away for almost two weeks removes someone from the fray.  I know that when I eventually have to return to real life all that I previously faced will be there.

But circumstances are changing.  Or at least I feel they are changing.  Or maybe it is just that I am changing.

But, to quote West Side Story, "Could it be?  Yes it could.  Something's coming, something good.  If I can wait."

Here is to the change I can sense even if I cannot now see it.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Friend, you've well defined the meaning of faith here. Just be careful and don't assume that you won't have your legs kicked out from under you and you find yourself flat on your bum before the good things happen. We often have to be torn down before we can fully recognize the good things that come our way.

Rev. Paul said...

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. (Hebrews 11:1)

Change can be uncomfortable, but is inevitable. May this one be to your benefit.

Toirdhealbheach Beucail said...

Thanks for the reminder. I always feel like the legs have been partially kicked out already but there's always room for more. Good gentle jog to remain humble.

Toirdhealbheach Beucail said...

And it is the discomfort that often causes me to choose not to change, Reverend Paul. Which is silly of course, because the change is coming anyway. Better to meet it on your feet than on your knees.