Thank you very much for sticking with me as I walked through this excursus to what I normally post. It has been good for me to revisit these things, even if I bit painful. In some cases, these are the first time I have formally revisited these since they occurred and for the original rejection of entering the ministry, this is something that has been a hidden sore point for over twenty years.
Sensibly of course, let me start with the beginning as the end.
The sermon series our church started last week was on the book of Jonah. You will remember Jonah: Minor Old Testament prophet whose story makes just about every children's Sunday School class ever (and made for great flannelgraphs, back in the day) and at least one full length feature ("Jonah: A Veggie Tales Movie"). It is famous enough that the concept of "being swallowed by a whale" has entered the public consciousness.
As you may recall from your Flannelgraph days, Jonah was prophet that was active in the Northern Kingdom of Israel circa 8th Century B.C. Israel at this this - "The 10 Northern Tribes" - had not followed the Davidic line of succession and in fact had (as state policy) abandoned God, although God had not abandoned them. One of their great adversaries - really of all the the region - was the Empire of Assyria, centered in Nineveh.
So when (in the first chapter of Jonah) God commands Jonah to go to Nineveh to preach repentance, he does a very human thing: he immediately says no and heads the opposite direction (literally). Not surprising for most of us, pretty surprising for an acknowledged prophet of God, and about the only example of a prophet specifically telling God "Nope".
Why? We find out later in the book, but Jonah is afraid that he knows God all too well and that if Jonah preaches repentance, the Assyrians will repent (which, of course, they do; long term we do not find out beyond the immediate how Jonah felt about this later in life). And that is not what Jonah believes should happen. They were enemies (to be fair, they were really awful people) and deserved punishment, not mercy. And so, as Jonah's interpretation of his task is not to preach repentance to God's enemies, he takes a trip.
In other words, Jonah has decided how he will serve God, not how God wishes him to serve.
God is God of course, and so after a storm, getting thrown overboard and swallowed by a giant sea creature and spending three days in its digestive track, God gives Jonah a second shot. He is thrown up on the beach and gets the same command: Go to Nineveh and preach repentance. This time, Jonah accepts his task, undoubtedly smellier and far more blanched for his troubles (although still pretty grumpy about extending mercy to the enemies of his nation-state).
This concept - determining how he would serve God, not how God wished him to serve - was what caught my attention and made me think.
I have (we probably all do) conceptions about things we are good and skilled at, places that our talents and gifts intersect with reality. It is sensible that we would seek out careers and hobbies that we enjoy and are in some way good at; should that not be the same in how we serve God?
It can be, of course: great singers are great singers no matter what they sing and great teachers are often great teachers in many subjects. But ultimately we serve at the pleasure of God, not the other way around.
I certainly am not suggesting that we should not explore how we can serve, or that our service may overlap our gifts. But what is apparent - at least for me - is that when I start to determine how I will best serve God, I may be putting myself in a position where God has to, first of all, remind me Who is in charge.
Which is a lesson one ought to learn. Getting vomited forth back on the beach multiple times can become a smelly, fishy business.
"I certainly am not suggesting that we should not explore how we can serve, or that our service may overlap our gifts. But what is apparent - at least for me - is that when I start to determine how I will best serve God, I may be putting myself in a position where God has to, first of all, remind me Who is in charge."
ReplyDeletePart of my daily prayer conclusion / wrapping up is asking God to give me the wisdom to listen for His instructions. I try not to be too rash in deciding my choice of action, hoping He will tell me what is correct.
That is a wonderful thought and prayer. I shall certainly add it to my list.
DeleteFlannelgraph, a word I have never heard before but one that instantly took me back to my bible school days.
ReplyDeleteEd, I feel like the use of words never used before is now something I should work on more!
DeleteIt is sad to me that current generations will never enjoy that particular medium - or doing things like positioning sheep and shepherds upside down over the Christmas Nativity.
During my sojourn of under employment in 2001-2002 I more often thought of being like Moses in the wilderness forty years. But he was a leader and me not. Your interpretation of Jonah’s calling and his destiny infer and also create a similar narrative for those crossroad places in our mortal life.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your Friday TB!!
Franknbean
FNB: I think the example of Moses is a good one (we all seem to have our set-aside times from God); where people tend to miss the boat is when they see themselves as being set aside for a position of leadership (like Moses or Paul). Like you, I am no leader. But I am under no illusions that a wilderness time is not a time of preparation, even if I should never have any position of authority again.
DeleteExcellent point! Another neat point was the simplicity of the message, "Yet 40 days and you're toast." I imagine him just muttering it. But God was at work and they took it to heart.
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to professional Christianity, folks seem to want polish and style. Amos poked fruit with a sharp stick to help it ripen. Called called THAT guy to be a prophet. And he didn't hold back. He used Baalam's donkey to instruct the prophet. Since God can use a donkey or a hick to do His work His way, He can use anyone. Even me.
It was a simple message - although one can only imagine that a blanched and smelly Jonah helped contribute to how he was received.
DeleteI am not so much for spit and polish per se, and agree that God can use anything and anyone (Amos is one of my favorite prophets). What I am for is sound biblical teaching, which - at least in my own experience - can be performed by the polished or by the unpolished.
So... where my mind went as I was reading this is a place of failure on my part. And I'm reminded how glad I am for stories of people God used, but who had some pretty serious flaws and failures. Part of me wants to share my story, but this isn't the place. Let me just say... I spent pretty much my entire adulthood failing to be who God wanted me to be in a particular relationship, never really recognizing my failure - only to come face to face with it at a point in time when it was too late for me do anything about it. If that were the end, it would be a sad story indeed, but thank God it wasn't the end. God has been merciful and shown me how He has and continues to redeem my failure. I feel deep regret and pain over what I can't change, but at the same time I am in a quiet, sometimes fearful awe as I see how God worked where I had failed...
ReplyDeleteGod clearly uses you, TB. :)
I've been reflecting on this series. I have personal experience from similar scenarios, but I processed them differently. Your take on how they impact one's sense of serving God was something I hadn't thought of and so good food for thought.
ReplyDeleteI guess I looked at it more as a test of faith; the old "squeeze a tube of toothpaste." The choices at the time seemed to be hurt, anger, and resentment, or forgiveness. I could either look at what they did, or I could look at what I could do. It helps to have specific verses to recall, such as humbling oneself before God and laying down one's life. Jesus' example - he submitted without a word. Also, my go-to "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks, for this is God's will for you." Of course, it's difficult to give thanks in pain, but I suppose that's what meant by a sacrifice of praise. Testing of faith -> endurance -> spiritual maturity. That's a promise to hang on to.
Leigh - I suspect the experiences are more wide spread that we know; I also suspect that most of us think we are isolated and alone in this feeling. It is something that is not preached about or talked about much at all.
DeleteI had not thought about the test of faith aspect, but definitely that is present as well. Honestly, I struggle a great deal more with that, probably from experiences in "real life": often a "no" in real life is the end of the matter.
Patience, for me, has always been the hardest to learn, let alone rejoicing in the pain and feelings (real or not) of rejection. Which may be why God keeps bringing it up.
Hey TB, as usual, I'm catching up, and have just read all the posts in your "Preconceptions" series. I won't take the time to comment on all the nuggets you've put out there, other than to say there are some things -- perhaps many things -- about God and serving him we'll never understand, as we say in the South, this side of heaven. We will always "see through a glass darkly" to some extent. What I have found over and over, however, is God is just and merciful and He consistently redeems times of languishing, loss and uncertainty. I cling to that. Thanks for more great content to ponder.
ReplyDeleteBob - Agreed that we never fully understand the tapestry of our lives until we will see things from His point of view in Heaven (insert standard word picture of "stitching on one side versus the finished product" here). But I appreciate the reminder that nothing is truly wasted in God's economy, even those times that we feel that we are doing nothing (and I have nothing to complain of; Moses had 40 years of "nothing but sheep" to do).
DeleteAnd thanks as always for the kind words.