So today I returned back to a part of Old Home, to the places that The Ravishing Mrs. TB and I lived when we first got married. It is a fortuitous occurrence in this week of our wedding anniversary.
It is an odd thing, traveling the highways and roads that I traveled 23 years ago when we first got married. As I write this, I sit in the same town where we first lived when we got married. I had dinner 5 doors down from the print shop that I worked at then. The print shop is gone, replaced by some other business, but the streets still remain the same.
A flood of memories invoked themselves unasked, in some ways memories from a time long passed. Before children. Before my career field that I am in now. Before so many things of the things that figure into our lives even existed. In some ways a very very different me.
But not a me I would necessarily change.
So many different paths over the years, so many chances to chose another course that led somewhere else or to something else. Occasionally I wonder what those paths might have been.
I find myself content.
TB - i am glad that you are feeling content! but what is your field of work? if that is TMI to share here - send me an email. i have always been curious.
ReplyDeletesending much love. your friend,
kymber
No worries Kymber. I am Quality Assurance for the biopharmaceutical/medical device industry. Certainly not what I had planned growing up or in college, but it pays the bills.
DeleteMuch love, TB
Most of us go through a period, after reaching middle age, of wondering "what if ..?" If you remain content with the choices made, you're a rarity. Most "midlife crises" are the result of someone panicking at the thought of (perceived) lost opportunities.
ReplyDeleteReverend Paul, I would love to say that I am always content with the choices I have made but that would be a bit of an overstatement. Perhaps saying I am generally content is more accurate. Experience and observation come into play, as one can see the "panicking" you reference above and the results of it all around.
DeleteJohn MacArthur made a statement once that I love: Disillusion is the product of illusion. If I have no illusions then I cannot be disillusioned when they do not work out. In this sense modern society is very much ranged against us: it tells us we have the right to everything, whenever we want. It is a struggle - or at least it is a struggle for me - to be willing to confront the illusions my mind brings to bear about the "lost opportunities" and "things I deserve". I must constantly remind myself that living in reality is the best way to navigate life, not in a world of might haves and my projected needs.