A Talk with Hope

The one person I wanted to speak with this morning was Hope.

I keep hoping that she will be there when I come down in the morning (although Depression always seems to be the first one up), but this never seems to be the case. I've left a number of messages but somehow (even in this age of instant communication) making contact seems virtually impossible.

However, today was the morning. As I rounded the stairs, I saw the light on in the family room. Finally. I would get to talk to her. I sorely needed to.

I came through the door frame. The coffee was made, the light was on - no Hope sitting on the couch. I sighed, got my coffee and then went over to sit down. There, on the couch, was a letter.
"To Toirdhealbheach Beucail" it said in Hope's penmanship.

Well, here was something anyway.

I opened the folded in lip of the envelope and pulled out the sheet of paper. It was the beautiful blue color I've seen her use to others, the ink color a rich dark black. I pulled up the upper and lower folds.

"Dear Toirdhealbheach Beucail:

First of all, I apologize for not communicating earlier. I'm sorry -things have been a bit busy lately and some thing always end up fallen through the cracks.

I know that you've been desperately in need of a conversation with me a while. That's my job you know - Hope, lifting spirits and fueling passions, enabling those to see beyond their own circumstances to a brighter tomorrow. I enjoy doing it a great deal, and often like to think that I've had some impact on your day to day life.

Unfortunately, I can't do that for you right now.

This letter is to inform you that I am taking a leave of absence for an undetermined period of time. I'm sorry I can't fully tell you why - please accept that this is a personal matter of the greatest importance.

I know this will come as a shock to you, especially due to the lack of communication over the last year or so. Understand that this is nothing that you've done, and certainly nothing that anyone else could control.

I fully intend to be back manning the Hope desk (my small pun -I know you'll like it) as soon as everything is put back in order. In the meantime, I've taken the opportunity to compile a small reading list of helpful quotes which I put by your bed if the need the arises. In my absence, Adventure has agreed to sit in for any critical meetings or projects. Please find attached a copy of my signatory authority designation empowering him to do so.

In closing, I apologize again. I know this is fairly inconvenient timing. Please accept my humblest apologies and know that even while I am working out these significant issues in my life, my thoughts are with you.

Your Optimist, Hope"

I sat there holding the letter, looking at it in disbelief. This would explain the lack of communication, anyway. I sighed and put it down next to me, picking my coffee back up.

Taking a sip, I considered my options. No Hope. I knew Adventure would listen and possibly give advice, but his solution always seems to be "Let's go do something - risky, if possible". Not the best of companions for a day to day life. The times I had listened to him on serious matters never seemed to go quite as well as they should have.

On the bright side I suppose, Hope did not say she was going to be gone indefinitely, just for a while. A while meant coming back at some point.

Still, there was the day to face. And the next one. And the next one.

Which I'd have to do. I'm the dad. I have done it before. I can do it again.

Just because there is no Hope doesn't mean there is no life.