Did you ever have one of those moments where suddenly you realize that you and a loved one - spouse, friend, parent - are living in separate yet parallel universes? You share the same experiences, eat the same food, fold the same laundry, yet beneath the surface you suspect (not sure, of course) that you're looking at things completely differently?
Why is this? Is this a result of a modern life that does it's best to keep us apart from loved ones, so that the time we share together is almost by default and by silent agreement kept on an even keel, if for no other reason we fear to waste it in seemingly fruitless arguments? Or is it less lofty: we just don't think the other person shares our views, so why bother?
I know for myself, I often completely get wrapped up in seeing aspects of the situation that I think exist, pondering them over and over, working out scenarios in my mind - only to have them torn apart by the fact that the other person is seemingly unaware of the same thing (which raises another question: Did the thing ever exist? Or was it just in my mind?)
How does one crack this rind and get to a deeper level of knowing? Conversation alone will not carry the day - one can speak all day and say precisely nothing. Focused communication then, but focused how? Focused on what?
Action. Talk is cheap. It can help focus thoughts, ideas, and feelings, but in the end only action will change things.
ReplyDelete"Do not let your circumstances change you. Change so that your circumstancees will change."
Right enough. I suppose my comment would be in general that people are far more prone to action than they are to thinking about the situation and what is the appropriate action e.g. writing the flaming e-mail versus considering a response.
ReplyDeleteBut you are correct. Only action counts, otherwise it's just a series of good ideas that don't make a difference.